SELECT FROM OUR RANGE OF UNIQUE ORIGINAL FUNNY SCRIPTS Funny play scripts for kids Short play

scripts for schools children's theatre and youth theatre PLAYSCRIPTS FOR PERFORMANCE BY CHILDREN Short plays Play scripts for community theatre PLAY SCRIPTS FOR PERFORMANCE BY ADULTS Funny samples: Read below some examples of writing and funny amusing humorous excerpts from play scripts by Robert Reed: For more funny samples visit: - funny script for kids Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves - funny jr high school script Aladdin - very funny high school script Romeo and Julie - script for kids 4th July: Independence Day - funny educational scripts Henry VIII: Big Hal Knows Best or Don't Mess with Boudica From the Christmas comedy script "Merry Penguins" CHARLIE: That was wonderful! ALFIE: Flying is great fun! MAX: We even looped-the-loop and flew upside-down!OPENSLAE: So, that was probably when Father Christmas fell out. (All Penguins point to the sleigh in horror.) ALL PENGUINS: Oh, no! From the script of "The Boston Tea Party"

TEA DRINKER 1: Ooh, what a lovely drink! It's incredibly popular in America you know. There are four main types of tea: white, green, oolong and black. We mainly drink green tea in the colonies. I just don't know what I'd do if I was deprived of my daily cup. TEA DRINKER 2: Well, thankfully that's hardly likely to happen is it? In fact, I'd say that situation could never ever arise.

(Enter PROTESTER.)

PROTESTER: Put that drink down immediately! It contains the seeds of slavery.

(Tea Drinker 1 and 2 examine tea cups.)

TEA DRINKER 2: No, it doesn't. It contains tea leaves. PROTESTER: Well, yes. What I mean is that if you accept British tea, you're also accepting the King's authority to make laws over our land. TEA DRINKER 2: (Lowering cup.) Really?

(Tea Drinker 1 continues to drink happily.)

From "The Back to the Past Guide to Great Scientific Breakthroughs" children's playscript NARRATOR: Previous designs for manned flight had involved a lot of flapping. (Two strangely dressed people holding wings enter stage, warm-up like

athletes, flap furiously and jump from chair, one after the other and walk off sadly.) It didnt really work.
From "The Christmas Miracle" kids Christmas play

MRS. MACINTOSH: Now lets say grace. Hands together. (Curly sitting one side

of Stan puts her hands flat against his.)

MRS. MACINTOSH: Your OWN hands. From children's theatre play "Cosmic Pets" CAPTAIN THUNDERBOOTS: Youre a strange looking monkey. JAY: Thats because Im a boy!

From "The Lost Eagles" educational playscript

VARUS: (Showing picture of money bag going to Rome:)Were going to collect taxes (Showing picture of person being whipped on the bottom:) and give you some good ol Roman law. (Chieftains all groan.) VARUS: Ahh, but there is good news! Well build Roman baths, public toilets.... CHIEFTAIN #2: That looks fun. Whats it for? ... ARMINIUS: Remember my brave warriors, at last we can enjoy the greatest gift given by our gods. And what is that? (Pause. Raising arm in the air:) Freedom! ALL GERMAN WARRIOR BAND: (Raising arms in the air:) Beer! From "The Real Pierre Pan" parody playscript EAGLE G. (Gangster rap music plays) I iz the well minty boy from Staines, My rapping will blast out yor brainz, I dance betta than Adam n the Antz, But me gran tells me to change my pants. Aye! ... PIERRE PAN: Ive just had an idea. Lets see if the teachers can do it! Scrub the decks, salute the captain, and climb the rigging. Wakey, wakey, teachers: its better than attending a staff meeting...

(If teachers get order right:)

ALL: Hooray!

(If teachers get the order wrong)

PIERRE PAN: Ooh la la, you not listening to the order. But, we forgive you. There are a few humorous lines in Robert's dramatic plays too: From dramatic community and professional theatre script "Gothic Tale" LEONARDS: I didnt agree to the dying part! DEVIL: People rarely do.