5 Simple Steps to Help Christian Students Remain Pure During Prom and the Dating Season

By Joe Donahue, Student Ministries Pastor at First Redeemer Church

I hate the spring. I hate Valentines Day. I hate Prom. I hate romance. I hate love birds. Wellnot really. I just know that this time of season many teenagers get damaged because of poor choices in their dating life. They initiate a date because it is spring: Flowers aint the only thing blooming. Love and romance is as thick as the yellow pollen in Georgia. Teenagers begin to date, in most cases, because they feel as though they HAVE to have a date for Prom. In other words, they feel like they are supposed to date around Valentine s Day throughout the spring and into Prom season. Why? Because they feel alone. They feel as though they are supposed to date, because their friends are involved in romantic relationships. Sometimes, their parents put pressure on them to go to Promto wear the incredible dressto shine the car just rightlike an arranged marriage parents send out their students to play marriage for a night. Never forget, to a student, Prom is more than a danceit is an event. For many, an event they have been looking forward to since Middle School. Sadly, for many, their date for Prom as well as their dating relationships, defines who they are. There are a great tidal wave of videos and pictures capturing the moment when a young man invites a young lady to Prom. Whether at a Braves game, during intermission at a play, or in front of the class students across America are capturing the moment they were asked to Prom on video and sharing it online. The most memorable, the better. A quick YouTube search of Invitation to Prom will pull up thousands of ingenious and innovative methods of proposing the Prom question. The problem with the hype of Prom is that inevitably, Prom is a disappointment. Sure, there is much laughter and dancingbut Prom can NEVER live up to the hype or the imagination of a teenager. That is when it can get dangerous. It is not what happens at Prom that concerns me. It is what happens after Prom. A little bit of alcohol mixed with boyhood fantasies of after prom and the result is a lot of damaged Christians the following day. Because Prom did not live up to the hype, teens begin forcing it to be a good night through drinking, sex, and other non-Christ like behavior. When Prom ends at 11:30PM, why do parents allow their students to stay out all night? Is there anything pure that happens in a car or a hotel room after 11:30PM? Call me crazy. Call me rigid. Call me legalistic.

I believe that Christian students want their parents fighting for them in the area of sexual purity and temptation. They need their parents to set clear boundaries for them. I want to help parents and teenagers by offering 5 practical suggestions to help maintain sexual purity during prom and the dating season. 1. GROUP DATE. Begin the date with the group. Interact with the group. End with the group. Proverbs 27:17 (NLT) 17 As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. 2. USE WISDOM. Do not simply know what the right thing to do isDO the right thing. Apply wisdom to your actions and decisions. If your dress is cut too high or too low you are tempting your date. If you park your car somewhere to talk and you are alone you are ONLY being stupid. Get with your friends and talk someplace in public. Proverbs 7:4-5 (NLT) 4 Love wisdom like a sister; make insight a beloved member of your family. 5 Let them protect you from an affair with an immoral woman, from listening to the flattery of a promiscuous woman. 3. DONT PRAY ABOUT IT! (That is, dont pray about it with your date!) Prayer produces and develops a spiritual intimacyintimacy between teenage couple can fan the flames of raging desire and lust. I am not saying to never pray with your date , I am saying that leading up to Prom and during the evening pray together about sexual purity but pray together, apart. 4. DONT DATE AN UNBELIEVER! The first standard for your date should be that they are bornagain. Not the most popular. Not the hottest. Not a church attender. A born-again Christian who shares a desire to walk with Jesus in their life. Christ must be your common denominator. Sexual temptations and desires are so powerful already; you do not need to invite an unbeliever into your own battle for sexual purity. 2 Corinthians 6:13-15 (NLT) 13 I am asking you to respond as if you were my own children. Open your hearts to us! 14 Dont team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? 15 What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever? 5. KEEP THE CURFEW. NO EXCEPTIONS. Honor your parents, and the parents of your date. Talk with your parents about the temptations you are facing. If you are born-again, and your parents are born-again, they want to fight for you in your corner. Parents stop feeling awkward when your teenagers approach you. HELP THEM. Ephesians 6:1 (NLT) 1 Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do.
Joe Donahue can be contacted at joe@joespeaker.com.