Deborah Copher ED,S,

Oakwood Elementary Hall County

Deborah Copher Currently 3rd Grade teacher Oakwood Elementary Hall County, Georgia

20th year of teaching K-5 experience Personal Professional Goal this Year: Improve the Writing Environment in the Classroom

A New Approach to Writing

My kids, my grandson, and my husband.

A teacher write my own personal mentor texts? Absolutely! Today is interactive! Today is a day to consider something new! Today most of you will see yourself as a real writer after all, our students all do! Today I will show just a glimpse of personal mentor text writing with:
Zooming in on a moment Building a story of character (s), not just telling a tale from beginning, middle and end. If time, non-fiction writing Finally, closing with a powerful tribute to mentor text writing from my students.

Quick! Write down 5-10 words or short phrases that honestly describe you as an writer (good or bad) Go!

Now turn and talk with the person next to you and share your top three.

Share out with whole group common themes.

Cool I have nice handwriting I want to write cursive I like to write Hate it I dont know what to write about Can I draw? How many sentences? September - 2012

Persuasive *Has stamina Imaginable *Satisfying Confident *Shows individuality Positive *Character is important Focused *Adventurous Graceful *Safe Brave *Full of Ideas Emotional *Organized Diligent *Surprising Passionate *Simple Full of Action *Has my opinion Interesting characters *Accurate Enjoyable *Rich with details Durable *Mysterious Have a story to share *A treasure Loves a message inside *Forgiving

March - 2013

My children: Are you EVER going to write down these stories you tell us? Time? Where do I start? I enjoy writingWhats considered a good story? How do I choose? What motivates me to tell a family story with my class?

Project Video

Stephanie Jones, with the Classroom Project from UGA, observed a writing lesson in my classroom about a story I was writing about my sisters new venture with raising chickens. Using Graphic Organizer journals

Her Observations:
When you told the story orally, they were completely engaged. They were begging to ask questions and clarify details. They were predicting, inferring, drawing conclusions automatically orally. Everything fizzled out when they went back to their seats to write. Why the disconnect? Even with conferring during individual writing time, the students got quiet, not reflective, writers block.

Stephanie If you could choose anything to work on to improve your teaching, what would you choose? Me I want them to learn to love to write. Stephanie Exactly! Suggestion? You have got to write these stories down. They are memories that needs preserving, they are stories that the kids can connect to, they love to hear them! They couldnt wait for you to tell them the ending. They want to hear more. We talked about how I plan writing lessons, student needs, conference observations,etc. Then her one question for me at the end

Writing the story before? Not a little each day on chart paper? What would be the purpose of that? How will that make it more meaningful? Stephanies Challenge: Find a time everyday to write even 5 minutes. Write your next story completely. Then write your lesson plans. See what happens to the intent of your lessons. Sure enough as I wrote the story, the craft lessons the students needed (conferencing data), started presenting themselves as I wrote. I made notes as I wrote, but wrote the complete story. But the lessons, I realized were all student focused on their individualized needs.

Bird by Bird Some Instructions on Writing

and Life by Anne Lamott

Let the Polaroid develop; in other words, observe, watch, listen, stay in the moment, until you understand what you want to write about. Anne Lamott

Article 14 Writing Tips from Anne Lamott Handout in folder

 ZOOM

IN! Quickly choose a moment, a snapshot, in your memory and just write until I say stop. Share?

Flip over your writing and list several writing craft lessons that come to mind from student conferences. Build craft lessons into the story as you write it with the class (chart paper). Ask students for comments and questions. Use those suggestions to make the writing stronger. Differentiating for students? Absolutely!

Intentional Craft Lessons: *Zoom in on a moment *Getting the readers attention (hook) *Sound words for description *Flashback *Dialogue *Variety of word choice for said. *Transitions *Figurative Language *Possible conclusions

In order to put myself in their shoes as writers, they had to see me as a writer like them. How?
*I asked for feedback. They loved that! *Quality of questions, wonderings, suggestions, comments developed rapidly. Quality of writing improved dramatically.

Whats a Kodak Moment? Is it ok to put a quote from the song, Singing in the Rain? You could put it right here. Why were they in the rain? (This provided the flashback opportunity) Lets put the sound of the wood-chipper like RRRRRrrrr in there. That would be cool! Why do people say, raining cats and dogs? This is a memory for you and Mr. Copher! Ive got a great idea for the conclusion put the picture at the end as the moment you clicked the camera!

This rain, that had teased us all day, suddenly

appeared as if the heavens had opened up and overflowed. The thunder ceased when the rain began. It was truly raining cats and dogs.

So this is how it came to be that three kids, troupers for the duration of a Saturday project, , suddenly found themselves soaked to the skin, dancing and singing in the rain. Todd and I snuck closer, hiding under the dripping umbrella, and I put my camera in place, finger ready to snap the moment that was to comeClick! My finger snapped the button just at the right moment

Let the plot grow out of the characters. If you find that you start a number of stories or pieces that dont get finished, it may be that there is nothing at their center about which you care passionately for. Put yourself at THEIR center you and what you believe to be true or right.-Anne Lamott

Story Idea Mamas Quilt Top Story Web #1

Drama moves forward and upward-Anne Lamott I write with the thought of discovering a story, not just telling one. Terry Kay, award winning novelist, journalist, playwright. Not happy with the story, and how it was coming together, I went back to the idea that this story was really about my mother not my memory, or the quilt. I drew a timeline in my journal of the quilt tops journey, and what was happening in her life. Called and talked to her. Very interesting facts she filled in that I never knew.

Traveling Back in Time

Late 1960s Top stored away in box Mama raising family plus New baby (me)

Early 1970s Move housesQuilt stays in storage.

Mid-1960s Quilt top assembledNot finished

Mama gets quilt pattern from Gma Daisy (my dads Grandmother) Road to Oklahoma pattern (special family meaning)

Early 1960s Fabric Scraps From Homemade Clothes

But

Time moves on

Jan. 1997Quilt put awaytoo painful to look at. Dec. 1996 Christmas Present

July-Aug 1996 With help, I preserve the quilt and finish it.

30 Years Box moved, never unpacked

June1996-Mama has moved. I drive out to Help her move in; unpacking boxes. I find the lone box. Unpack it and find the quilt top I never knew existed. Mama shocked-tearsdoesnt want to see it. I realize why, finally. I asked to bring it home and have it finished.

Another 15 years go by

The quilts journey was a story to tellbut the discovered story is journey of my mother in concert with the quilt. Her character travels through a story of joy, happiness, loss, sorrow, pain, and finally comfort. Thats the

story.

Its on my bed, of course. I like having it near me now. I get so lonely with your brother and sister gone, Jim and you so far away. It helps me feel like a part of all four of you are here. Quilt top has come full circle Once planned as a future treasure, it now is although for Oct. 2012 a different reason. Mama, what ever happened to that quilt I finished for you?

New graphic organizer start-

New focus Develop her character What is most important to her as the character? What do I see through her characters eyes; emotions ; life Set up story Built forward and upward Payoff or conclusion

Oh, thats just an old thing I made years ago, from extra

scraps of material I had.

Her comments stopped suddenly with a large pause. Then she went back to unpacking the box she had just unwrapped, and made herself noticeably busy, pulling newspaper from glass figurines. I sensed her hesitation.

Mama? Would you mind if I laid it out and looked at it? My question was hesitant, bracing myself for the reaction coming. Well, I guess so. But I dont want to see it. Ill go upstairs and start some lunch. Make sure to fold it up and put it in the box when you are done. And with that, she walked quietly to the stairs and slowly climbed up them.

Soon, I began to remember seeing some of the material scraps hidden away within my childhood memories. The black and white print from my sisters square dance dress, the plaid from my brothers pjs, pink material from an Easter dress my sister had her picture made in when she was little Within moments I began to realize these fragile scraps were really precious memories of a young mother with three little kids, trying to make ends meet. This was pieced long before I, the youngest, ever came along.

This quilt had begun as a keepsake, a record of time and happy occasions to be treasured for generations. Now a piece of history, a silent reminder of overwhelming sorrow and loss for the two children who passed away as early adults within three years of each other. Her own painful divorce near the same time. Looking at this now was terribly painful for her, and also for me, as I wiped tears from my eyes.

Turn and talk about what you know about this character. How do you know? What questions are arising? What is not said, but is understood? (Inferred)

Make writing a want tonot a must too! -Terry Kay, novelist.

Researching/asking about family and stories Developing the character Asking What if? Descriptive language to display emotion Dialogue Questioning Skills as you are writing Re-wording sentences to make stronger emotion. Importance of illustrations in text.

Why is she alone? What if the movers had lost that box? I think you should use hesitation there instead of the word worry How about saying, My curiosity was overflowing with questions, instead of grew even more. You need more dialogue from your mom. What else did she say? Wheres the quilt? What does it look like? Dont you have a picture of the quilt? Lets just call your mom. She can tell us. Maybe she can email a picture of it to us? Is she still sad?

Why are you frustrated? How can I help? -Im frustrated about the story and spelling the words. How did people feel when this happened? She felt Hey buddy! Dont tell me that! Write it down-thats good stuff. Hey-youve had something really important happen in your family. You should contrast how your family was before the divorce, and now how you just told me you are learning to be happy in a different way.

For Mama, Gail June Heath Piper Quilt presented by your daughter Deborah Annette Piper Copher Pieced by you circa 1960 Lamar, CO Quilted and Completed by Me September, 1996 Oakwood, Georgia With all my love

This is our goal as writers, I think; to help others have this sense ofwonder, of seeing things anew, things that can catch us off guard, that break in on our small, bordered worlds. Anne Lamott Anyone who wants to, can be surprised by the beauty or pain of the natural world, of the human mind and heart, and can try to capture just that-the details, the nuance, what is.-Anne Lamott

When we see what catches us off guard, and when we write it as realistically and openly as possible, it offers hope. Anne Lamott

How did she become a best friend? Why? What if she moved away? What would you do? Is something about her character like yours? Whats that word? Could you use a different word that might have more meaning or add some Pizzaz I think you should change this word in the sentence. It doesnt sound right. It doesnt go with the meaning. You need to add more details to this. You could put much more effort into this. Im not sure what the point is to your chapter.

Whales Quote: Craft Lesson: Text Features Student Samples

Its important for them to design their journal with their own keepsakes and reminders of personal stories. Gives them immediate ownership. It is powerful to see the change in the students writing, and approach a variety of topics, and feel safe enough to do so. My vulnerability to share my stories, sad or happy, helps level the playing field and write WITH the children. The comfort level of all have increased. They feel confident to question and draw conclusions, correct grammar mistakes, etc. Writing teams are awesome! They can build a story together. I am not just a teacher anymore, I am a writer!

These Items are in your folder: 14 Writing Tips from Anne Lamont Short Biography and Writing Thoughts from Terry Kay Looking for the Best Way Post from Avi, author (active writing blog post)

Based on the mentor text, In My Family by Carmen Lomas Garza www.cophermentortextwriting/weebly.com