Alone Together

Why we expect more from technology and less from each other.

By Sherry Turkle

Presented By: Andrea, Vanessa, & Pauline

Activity #1 We are going to try an experiment, please close

your laptops, tablets, and put away your cell

phone.

Try to not access your device during the

presentation and we will go into discussion later.

 About the Author

Sherry Turkle: Psychoanalytically trained psychologist

● As technology continued to evolve Sherry began to

question the impact of technology on our lives. She
began to wonder, how were computers changing us
as people?
● Began to explore the inner history of devices which
initiated a 15 year research project, observing over
450 people (300 children and 150 adults)
● She listened to how people talked and watched how
they behaved among their new “thinking machines.”
Introduction

● Technology is seductive when what it offers meets our human vulnerabilities

● We are lonely but fearful of intimacy
● “Love with robots will be as normal as love with other humans.” Levy argues that
robots will teach us to be better friends and lovers because we will be able to practice
on them.
● Technology is redrawing the boundaries between intimacy and solitude.
○ Cheating. Abandonment. Too many demands.
○ Robots are safe, predictable, efficient
● Technology is offering a substitute for connecting with each other.
○ Instead of face-to-face communication we now email, instant message, text,
and Twitter.
Nearest Neighbor

● Before Siri and Alexa there was ELIZA

● In the mid 1970 Joseph Weizenbaum’s created ELIZA- a natural language processing computer
program.
● It was created to demonstrate the superficiality of communication between man and machine.
● Eliza simulated conversation by using a 'pattern matching' and substitution methodology that gave
users an illusion of understanding on the part of the program
● Students understood that the program didn’t really understand their conversations, nevertheless
they wanted to spend more alone time with the machine.
Nearest Neighbor cont.

● Computers were intelligent machines in contrast, people were

emotional machines
● But in the late 1990s children met objects that presented themselves as
having feelings and needs
○ People were no longer the only emotional machines.
○ Tamagotchi and Furbies
■ Tamagotchis: grew from babies to adults and needed
constant care and attention
■ A Tamagotchi was very much alive for a child. Each
Tamagotchi was unique and they blamed themselves for
their death.
■ “My baby died in his sleep. I will forever weep. Then his
batteries went dead. Now he lives in my head.”
Alive Enough
● In 1990s children spoke about making their virtual creatures more
alive by having them escape the computer
○ Furbies came along- the sensation of the 1998 holiday season
○ Like a Tamagotchi the way it was treated shaped their
personality
○ They were both presented as visitors from other worlds that
needed to love and nurturing
● Furbies had their own language. They arrived speaking Furbish.
○ The Furby manual instructed children, “ I can learn to speak
English by listening to you talk.”
○ Children believed that the child who loved his or her Furby
best will be most loved in return.
○ Children take full responsibility and sympathy when a Furby
dies.
 Alive Enough
● Turing Test was initiated with adults:
○ The test consisted of adults holding a Barbie doll, Furby, and a
gerbil.
○ Adults come to the upside-down test knowing two things
■ The Furby is a machine
■ They are not torturers
○ Data showed that people had no problem holding the BArbie doll
upside down, but couldn’t hole a Furby upside down for more
than 30 seconds
■ Furbies speak- you hold it upside down
● It cries like an animal
● But then it says “ Me scared” as if it were a
person.
○ People were surprised by the results
● We are at the point of seeing digital objects as both creatures and
machines
True Companions
● In 1999 another computer wonder was released- AIBO
○ Depending on how AIBO was treated- it developed a distinct personality
■ It matures from a puppy to a grown-up dog
■ Learns new tricks and expresses feelings
● The founders of artificial intelligence were surprised with the ethical implications of their enterprise.
○ The impulse to create an object in one’s own image
○ But the roots are shaping us as well, teaching us how to behave so they can flourish
● Now we have a machine that we have molded, it is “alive enough” , can develop new skills, doesn’t shed, doesn’t
bite, and doesn’t die.
● Her concern is that in the case of children, their getting comfortable with the idea that a robot’s companionship is
even close to a replacement for a person
● Roxxxy- the world’s first sex robot
○ It senses touch and responds to it
○ Different personalities: from wild to frigid
○ You update it over the internet to expand its capabilities and vocabulary
○ While some think that it is “sad” to obtain such a machine- others believe, having a robot companion is better
than being alone
 Enchantment

● We as human are expecting more from our technology than from one
another
○ We expect the descendants of such primitive robots might
someday care for us
○ Many of the children she studied returned to empty homes after
school and wait for parents to come home from work
■ Often their babysitter is the television or a computer game
■ You program a robot- children from the study argue- that
they would more efficient than a human-more reliable and
could help with more practical matters
■ Can robots “double” for family members
● Grandparents
○ Considering these technology advances-embedding “human
emotions” is extraordinary- Sherry questions how far are humans
willing to give up to a robot.
Robot Connections

● There were discussions on how Cog and Kismet, interact with children and what children thought about the

robots

● Both adult and children are drawn to do whatever it takes to sustain a view of these robots as caring

● Robots can be used as a therapist and children are willing to work hard to win the robot’s affection

● Depending on the robots limitations, children also create narratives to explain why the robot cannot perform

certain tasks

● Children are desperate for attention, control, and a sense of connection, that is why they cling to the robot more

than other children

● There is a quote stating that “It is easy to become so immersed in technology that we ignore what we know

about life.”
Technology Replacement

● “Why do we believe that the next technology we dream up will be the first to prove not only redemptive, but

indestructible?”

● Studies are showing that some people seem to prefer a robot with simple demands to a person with more

complicated ones

● There is concern that robots could possible replace people

● Technology (robots) is now being used to take care each other, instead of relying on our loved ones

● Twenty years ago, most people assumed that people would always be each other’s best companion, however,

now robots have been added to the mix

● As we learn to get the most out of robots, we may lower our expectations of all relationships including those with

people
Robot and Human Interactions

● A robot’s gaze, face, and voice allow us to imagine a meeting of the minds

○ We expect and hope for more connections with robots

● Programmers of robots also feel close to them as creatures and machines

● They believe that such feelings will sustain people as they learn to collaborate with robots

● There is discussion on what is the difference between a robot and human connection to a pet and human

connection

○ Robots and pets fill the same void and bring the same amount of comfort

● We will evolve to love our tools; our tools will evolve to be lovable, ,

robots will heal our wounds

Robot and Human Interactions
Virtual World vs. Real World

● The network prepares us for relationships with less than what robots provides

● With sociable robots we are alone but receive the signals that tell us that we are

together

● Networked, we are together, but become less willing to get out there and take a chance

● There are people who spend time on the virtual world and role playing games who say

their online identities make them feel more like themselves than they do in the physical

world

● There has been many changes where now multitasking is a crucial skill for successful

work and learning in the digital culture

Activity #2 ● How does it feel not being able to access

your laptop, tablet or cellphone during this

presentation?

● Do you feel tempted to access one of them

during the presentation?

● How many of you have survived so far not

accessing your device?

● How many of you have already accessed

your device during the presentation?

Adolescent Connections

● Adolescents are willing to risk their lives in order to stay connected with the people around them

○ Like texting and driving, falling down while looking at their phone

● Adolescents often feel that they are never alone and away from their parents

● However, they want to stay connected just not connected to their parents

● Teenagers often feel that they need to be connected in order to feel like themselves

● Creating social media profiles can be time consuming where they feel that they need to watch what they post or

like online or who they friend online because they are concerned about how others may see it

● They worry that if they are modest and do not put down all of their interest and accomplishments, they will be

passed over by others

Adolescent Connections
Online Identity

● We can get consumed by what we post online and how we act online that we let it affect ourselves in the real

world

● We also find communication easier online, it is sometimes easier to apologize through a digital device instead of

saying it face-to-face

● There is also mixed feelings on how we want to receive news

● We work hard to give expressive voices to our

robots but are content not to use our own

● The chapter also mentions how parents are

playing catch-up with their children

Reduction and Betrayal
● Chapter 11 begins with an exploration of online role-playing games. First explored is the game “Second Life” and its potential for
being a therapeutic exercise. By “using the materials of the online life to confront the conflicts of the real and search for new
resolutions”, users may be able to issues of self.
● Adam plays “Quake” and “Civilization” for up to 15 hours at a time, but would not consider cutting back on game time, since it’s
essential to his self esteem. He loves the feeling of fulfillment he gets from helping bots in the game and his day job feels too
simple and mundane. Adam feels he will soon be out of work but finds working on his resume or on his dream career too daunting.

● “Looking to games for amusement is one thing, looking to them for a life is another” (P.224)
● Flow State: having clear expectations and attainable goals and a narrowed focus so that anxiety lessens. When we are
overstimulated, we are drawn to smaller worlds, like in online games, that may be tense in their challenges, but relaxing as the
stress of real life falls away.
True Confessions

● Confessional sites, like “Post Secret”, give users a place to anonymously speak out. Other readers may be cruel,
kind, or ignore your confessions. One user of the site says that it “offers the pretense of acceptance”.

● Another user of confessional sites states that they use it as a way to process through mistakes that they’ve made
and move on, without needing to apologize to the people their actions may hurt. This user points out that many
appear to use the sites this way, starting their posts with phrases like “I could never tell my husband but….”

● Some readers seem to attack various confessions, as they use them as a target for their own issues and
frustrations. One reader admitting that he felt extremely angered by a confession and attacked the poster for
ruining the relationship with her son, just as he was dealing with seeing his own son less often after divorce.

● Sherri points out that many people use these sites as a kind of therapy. However, in therapy, one learns new
ways to process old issues. Therapy also helps us to realize when we are projecting our own issues onto others.
On these sites, people are able to send their confessions to strangers and potentially receive encouragement but
do not get the insight of what is behind their confessions and struggles, nor have users built relationships of
sustaining support.
 Anxiety
● Mobile communication eases feelings of separation and
isolation for kids. They are no longer completely cut off
from parents and safety when they leave the house.
Having a cell phone means you are able to access
information and loved ones in case of an emergency (the
absence of the cell-phone talisman seems to cause a lot
of stress to those who were students during 9/11 and had
no contact to family)
. edited, and pasted, and shared among
● Hannah, sixteen, dreams of one day meeting Ian, who she
has been talking to online since she was eleven. Although
she shares concerns that this person, whom she loves,
may simply and easily one day disappear from her life.
She also acknowledges that the internet can “bring out the
worst in people”, and often her online friends can be cruel.
Originally, she hoped that having friends online would put
her in control of her social life, but, rather, she has found
that her online friends get angry if she has been too busy
to spend time with them.
● Various teenagers express concerns that
their actions may be posted online without
their permission. If they attend a party,
someone may take pictures and post them. If
they type something online, the conversations
may be copied and pasted, or even copied,
others.
● When teens realizes that their data has been
captured, they blame themselves for not
being more careful. Some are sure to record
their most private thoughts in a physical
notebook, where no one can access it.
Online, if they make a mistake, such as
writing something rude on a friend’s
Facebook, they can’t take it back.
The Nostalgia of the Young
● Many young people look fondly upon handwritten letters, the
privacy of payphones, and meeting people face to face, enjoying
the company of family or the beauty of nature. Commodities that
are rare for them.
Smart Phone Stress

● Texting comes with pressure. Many feel the need to be “on” and
“available” 24/7 and respond ASAP.

● Youth get used to having parents constantly multitasking,

sharing attention with the screen. Peers also multitask when
talking to friends online.They miss out on having time that fully
belongs to them.

● A desire to move away from the stage of social media (where

users put on a type of mask), and towards real, deep,
connections.

● Thoreau inspires us to ask: Do we live deliberately? Do we turn

away from life that is not life? Do we refuse resignation?
Final Thoughts
When “home computers” were first starting to move into people’s lives, there was a concern that it would be difficult to come up with
things to “keep the computer busy”. Now computers keep us busy.
Online we have...
● Company, but are exhausted by pressure to perform.
● Continual connection, but rarely anyone’s full attention.
● Instant audiences, but flattened conversations.
● Tools that know our habits to predict ways to help us, but a loss of privacy.
● The ability to work from home, but a loss of boundaries between work and home life.
● Reach others almost instantaneously but the need to hide our phones to have a quiet moment.
The ties that are formed through the internet are not the ties that bind, but they do preoccupy us.

We project meaning onto robots, but forget to ask “What does the robot feel?”. Do we care?
ELIZA’s popularity revealed people’s reluctance to talk to other people.
We put aside the lack of actual understanding to continue the fantasy that there is an alternative to dealing with people.
Activity #3 For this activity, we left picture of memes on each

whiteboard.

We are asking for you to look at the memes and

let us know what are the first thoughts that come

to mind?

You can write the information down on the

whiteboard.