H ABIT #1

Be Proactive
 Course Outlines

• Introduction
• Circle of Concern & Influence
• Social Mirrors
• Between stimulus and Response

• Proactive or Reactive

• Tasks
‫خرد کو غالمی سے آزاد کر‬
‫جوانوں کو پیروں کا‬
‫استاد کر‬
‫(اقبال)‬
H OW DO YOU FEEL ON DAYS LIKE THIS ?
Passive Reactive

Active Proactive
 Rainy Day
 Students
 Country
 Al-Aakhira
Reactive People
Proactive People
 Reactive People

Ohh!!!
I can’t do it
 Proactive People

Weldon !!
Yes!!!
I can do it
 Reactive People

Blame on
others
 Proactive People

Taking
responsibility
and be the
Pilot of your
life plane
 Reactive People

Everything is impossible for me

Proactive People
 W HICH
Reactive (the blame game)
 If someone calls you a
name, you call them one
back.
 If someone hits you, you
hit them back.
 If you get a bad grade, you
blame your teacher.
 If you lose a game, you
blame the other team.
ONE ARE YOU ?
Proactive (I am in control)
 You think before you act.
 You recognize you CAN’T
control everything that
happens to you, but you
can control what you do
about it.
 You don’t let others push
your buttons or allow you
to become angry or upset.
 W HERE DO YOU FALL ?

Very Very
Reactive Proactive

How could you be more proactive?

C IRCLE OF C ONCERN & I NFLUENCE
 C IRCLE OF C ONCERN & I NFLUENCE

Things you Circle of

can’t control
Circle
of
influence
Things you
can control
or change
concern

Focus on things you can change or influence

 W HICH OF THESE THINGS CAN WE
CONTROL ?

 The color of our skin?

 Weather?
 Parents?
 Things you did wrong in the past
 How other people treat me?
 Who will win (Pak/India) the cricket
match?
 W HICH OF THESE THINGS CAN WE
CONTROL ?

 Your attitude?
 Your mood?
 Your reaction to good and bad things
that happen?
 Things you did wrong in the past
 How I treat other people

Can you think of other examples from your life?

Between stimulus and Response
L EARN TO PUSH PAUSE
 L EARN TO PUSH PAUSE

 So when someone is rude to you, where

do you get the power to resist being rude
back?
 PUSH PAUSE
 Sometimes things happen so fast that we
instantly react out of habit.
 Learn to pause and gain control
 Think about how you will respond
 You will make better decisions
 *
Hazrat
Yusuf A.S
In Jail

*
*

Socrates Former
In jail In a jail
 L ET ’ S PRACTICE

We will read each situation and

then make a list of reactive and
proactive responses.
 S CENARIO 1

 You overheard your friend talking about

you to a group. She does not know that
you overheard the conversation. Just 5
minutes ago the same friend was being
extra nice to you. You feel hurt and
betrayed.

 Let’s classify some reactive and proactive

 S CENARIO 1
Reactive Proactive
 Tell her off  Forgive her
 Fall into a deep  Confront her and
depression because you CALMLY explain how you
feel so bad about what feel.
she said.
 Ignore it and give her a
 Give her the silent second chance.
treatment for being two
 Realize that sometimes
faced.
you talk behind her back
 Spread rumors about her and you really don’t
as payback! mean any harm.
 S CENARIO 2

 Mr. Hafeez is having a pizza party for his

students who have been using the skill of
getting the teacher’s attention appropriately
this week. When he read the list of the
students, your name was not on it. You
know you used the skill all week.

 Make a list of reactive and proactive

responses.
Expanding the Circle of Influence

There are so many ways

to work in the Circle of
Influence ……
 Expanding the Circle of Influence

• to be a better listener,

• to be a better student

• to be a more cooperative and dedicated

employee

• to make and keep commitments

 Sometimes the most proactive thing we can

do is to be happy, just to genuinely SMILE.
 Proactivity: The 30-Day Test

Observe the ordinary events of every day;

It's how we
• make and keep commitments,
• handle a traffic jam,
• respond to an irate customer or a
disobedient child
• view our problems and where we focus our
energies
• language we use.
 Challenge
For 30 days work only in your Circle of
Influence,
• Make small commitments and keep
them
• Be a light, not a judge
• Be a model, not a critic
• Be part of the solution, not part of the
problem.
T URNING S ETBACKS INTO S UCCESS

 Life often deals us a bad hand and it’s

up to us to control how we respond.

 Every setback is an opportunity for us to

turn it into a success.

No Arms No Legs No Worries Video

 S CENARIO 3

 Before university you were playing

basketball/any game with your
friends. The other team cheated
and ended up winning the game.
 Make a list of reactive and
proactive responses.
 S CENARIO 4

 You just found out that your little

sister/brother got gift and your
father promised to give you gift
over a next month.
 Make a list of reactive and
proactive responses.
M OTIVATIONAL M OVIE
C ONCLUSION