FAMILY; MARRIAGE LAWS; AND FAMILY

VALUES IN SRI LANKA

Lecture: 06

22nd November 2017

Prof. Samitha Manawadu

Department of Architecture
University of Moratuwa
FAMILY:
• In the context of human society a family is a group of people affiliated by
• Consanguinity (by recognized birth);
• Affinity (by marriage), or
• Co-residence (as implied by the etymology of the English word "family”)
and/or shared consumption;
• Members of the immediate family includes spouses, parents, brothers, sisters,
sons and/or daughters;
• Members of the extended family may include grandparents, aunts, uncles,
cousins, nephews, nieces and/or siblings-in-law;
• In most societies, the family is the principal institution for the socialization of
children;
• As the basic unit for raising children, anthropologists generally classify most
family organization as
• Matrifocal (a mother and her children);
• Conjugal (a husband, his wife, and children; also called the nuclear
family);
• Avuncular (for example, a grandparent, a brother, his sister, and her
children); or
• Extended (parents and children co-reside with other members of one
parent's family);
Conjugal (nuclear or single) family:
• The term "nuclear family” is commonly used, to refer to conjugal families;
• A "conjugal” family includes only the husband, the wife, and unmarried children
who are not of age. Sociologists distinguish between conjugal families
(relatively independent of the kindred of the parents and of other families in
general) and nuclear families (which maintain relatively close ties with their
kindred);
• However, in the 21st century, the "nuclear family”, is "disappearing at a rapid
rate are homes with "traditional" nuclear families—Mom, Dad and two
children.”
• The nuclear family is being replaced by other family structures such as blended
parents, single parents, and domestic partnerships.

Matrifocal family:
• A "matrifocal" family consists of a mother and her children, generally are of her
biological offspring, although adoption of children is a practice of society;
• This kind of family is common where women have the resources to rear their
children by themselves, or where men are more mobile than women;
• A family or domestic group is matrifocal when it is centred on a woman and her
children;
• Father(s) of these children are intermittently present in the life of the group and
occupy a secondary place;
Extended family:
• The term is also common, and has two distinct meanings;
• First, it serves as a synonym of "consanguinal family" (consanguine means "of
the same blood");
• Second, in societies dominated by the conjugal family, it refers to "kindred" (an
egocentric network of relatives that extends beyond the domestic group) who
do not belong to the conjugal family;.
Blended family:
• The term blended family or stepfamily describes families with mixed parents: one
or both parents remarried, bringing children of the former family into the new
family;
Monogamous family:
• Monogamous family is based on legal or social monogamy, with an individual has
only one (official) partner during their lifetime or at any one time;
Polygamous family:
• Polygamy is a marriage that includes more than two partners; When a man is
married to more than one wife at a time, the relationship is called polygyny; and
when a woman is married to more than one husband at a time, it is called
polyandry;
• If a marriage includes multiple husbands and wives, it can be called polyamory
group or conjoint marriage.
Polygyny:
• Polygyny is a form of plural marriage, in which a man is allowed more than one
wife; In modern countries that permit polygamy, polygyny is typically the only
form permitted;

• Polygyny is practiced primarily (but not only) in parts of the Middle East and
Africa; and is often associated with Islam.

Polyandry:
• Polyandry is a form of marriage whereby a woman takes two or more husbands
at the same time;

• Fraternal polyandry, where two or more brothers are married to the same wife, is
a common form of polyandry;

• Polyandry was traditionally practiced in areas of the Himalayan mountains,

among Tibetans in Nepal, in parts of China and in parts of northern India;

• Polyandry is most common in societies marked by high male mortality or male

Kandyan Marriage Laws:
Sri Lanka, several legal systems govern the law of family relations;

• General law (a combination of Roman Dutch and English law) is the main
system applicable to every one except if they are governed by the personal
laws;

• Laws are grounded in ancient customary practices and/or religion

• Kandyan Law,
• Thesavalamai; and,
• Muslim Law.

• "deega" (marriage in which the bride shifts to her bridegroom's house),

• "paraveni" (property inherited from her father);

• "binna" (marriage in which the bridegroom shifts to the bride's house)

Contents of personal laws:

• General, Kandyan & Muslim marriages are registered by three types of

registrars;

• Disputes relating marriage are also resolved by different authorities;

• Muslim personal law first adjudicated by the Quazi and an appeal to the
common Court of Appeal;

• Kandyan law, marriages are registered and dissolved by special registrars;

• General law, registration is by specially appointed registrars and the dissolution

is adjudicated by the District Court; Kandyan, Thesavalamai and General law
intestate succession is adjudicated by the District Courts;

• Thesavalamai is not applicable to the area of marriage registration etc. and

persons governed by the Thesavalamai for interstate succession are governed
by the general law for all aspects of marriage except the control of property by
women;
Kandyan:
• The Kandyan law is applicable to all Kandyan Sinhalese, whose parents can
trace their lineage to the Kandyan Provinces during the Kandyan Kingdom and
include those who currently do not reside in "Kandyan areas“;

• Thus not all people domiciled within the Kandyan provinces fall within the
definition of a "Kandyan Sinhalese“;

• The areas of Kandyan law that are currently retained in Sri Lanka relate to
marriage and divorce and intestate succession;

• All Kandyans have the option of choosing whether they marry under the
Marriage and Divorce (Kandyan) Act [M &D (K)A] and, thus be governed by the
Kandyan laws or the General Marriages;

• Ordinance in which case, they would be governed by the Roman Dutch law;

• In the case of intestate succession, a Kandyan person is governed by the

Kandyan Law by virtue of the Kandyan Law Ordinance (KL) as well as the
Matrimonial Rights and Inheritance Ordinance;

• Some areas of the Kandyan laws on adoption are also applicable here;

• In all other areas such as maintenance and custody the general law applies
Thesavalamai:
• The Thesavalamai is part of some ancient customs of Tamils in Sri Lanka
and India;

• In Sri Lanka the law is applicable to the " Malabar inhabitants of the Jaffna
Peninsular" and the persons governed by the law include those who do not
reside in Jaffna any longer;

• The only areas of the Thesavalamai personal laws that are now applicable
are matrimonial rights with respect to property and intestate succession;

• These are governed by the Matrimonial Rights and Inheritance (Jaffna)

Ordinance [MR &I (J)O]. In all other areas, the general law applies.
Muslim Law:

• Muslim special laws are applicable to who follow Islam, and, in all areas of
family the Muslim law applies, in the event of marriages between Muslims, no
options of marrying under the General law;
• Marriage, divorce and related areas are governed by Marriage & Divorce
(Muslim) Act [M&D(M)A] No. 13 of 1951 and subsequent amendments;
• As per the act, law is applicable to marriages and divorces and other matters
connected herewith, of Muslim inhabitants of Sri Lanka;
• Act covers a range of areas & clarifies situation of women of Shafi sect;
• The areas of intestate succession and donations are dealt with by the Muslim
Intestate Succession Ordinance No.10 of 1931 (MISO) that is applicable to the
intestacy of and donations made by Muslims either domiciled or owning
immovable property in Sri Lanka;
• Act merely states that the law applicable will be that of the relevant sect and it
is necessary to examine the Muslim law itself in order to ascertain its contents;
• It is important to note that both Acts make provisions for the laws governing
each sect that the person in question belongs to prevail, notwithstanding
anything to contrary in the Act itself.
General Law:
• Every area of family laws is covered by some aspect of general law;
• Marriage including age, procedure, registration, & its dissolution, by divorce or
a judicial separation is governed by Civil Procedure Code (CPC) and the
General Marriage Ordinance (GMO)’
• GMO is applicable to all marriages except Muslims;
• It has provisions for recognition of traditional forms of marriage as being valid;
• Matrimonial rights of married persons with regard to property and intestate
succession is n the Matrimonial Rights & Inheritance Ordinance (MR & IO) and
Married Women's Property Act (MWPA);
• Above not applicable to Kandyans, Muslims or Thesavalamai laws;
• Adoption Act is applicable to all communities, but in terms of intestate
succession, applicability differs according to the community.;
• General law on maintenance is contained in the Maintenance Ordinance;
• Wills Ordinance lays down law regarding wills, applicable to any one with no
prohibitions on the types of bequests that may be made by a will in Sri Lanka.
Minimum age of marriage:
• Under the general law and the Kandyan Law, minimum age is now 18 years for
both males and females;
• Under the Muslim law, there is no minimum age although the registration of a
marriage of a girl under 12 years of age is prohibited unless authorized by the
Quazi;
• Under the Penal Code of Sri Lanka, general age of consent for sexual relations
is 16 years;

Rights of married women:

• Concept of separation of property forms a strong basis in terms of rights of
married women;
• They own their own property;
• Dowry that is given by the family is also usually given in the woman's name;

• Under the Matrimonial Rights and Inheritance (Jaffna) Ordinance however,

women married under the Thesavalamai can not dispose of their property
without the written consent of their husband except by Will;
• This is not the case for other women in Sri Lanka.
Divorce:
• General law, divorce is based on "fault" rather than on the irretrievable
breakdown of marriage;

• Grounds are same for both parties; Kandyan law, grounds are same for both
parties, but a wife seeking a divorce from her husband on the basis of adultery
must also establish an additional ground of incest or gross cruelty;

• Divorce on mutual consent is available under the Kandyan law.;

• Further, unlike the General law, a divorce is granted by the Registrar of

Marriages under the Kandyan law, thereby making dissolution of marriage a
much simpler procedure;

• Muslim law, a man seeking a divorce does not need to specify a ground for
divorce whereas women must establish either ill treatment or an act/omission
which amounts to a 'fault'.;

• As far as procedure is concerned, however, either procedure is much simpler

than the more cumbersome two-part procedure under the General law.
Status:
• Women marrying outside their community or race are governed by the
personal law of their husbands while men in the same position are still
governed by their own personal laws;

• Under the Married Women's Property Ordinance and also Matrimonial Rights
and Inheritance Ordinance, a woman marrying a man of different race takes
on his race until she remarries;

• The rule regarding the status of a Kandyan woman marrying in Binna is not
made clear here;

• A woman marrying under the Thesavalamai is only subject to this rule during
the subsistence of the marriage;

• The result of this is that women who marry outside their community lose their
customary rights of inheritance;

• Any Muslim who does not marry under the Muslim Marriage Act (and possibly
their children) loses the right to inheritance under Muslim Intestate;

• Succession Ordinance thereby further restricting the women's choices

regarding self and communal identity.
FAMILY VALUES:
• Involve all of the ideas of how a person want to live his family life, and they are
often passed down from previous generations;

• They can help define behaviour in various situations, help youth make good
choices, and solidify the bond that the family has;

• If a family doesn't already have these values in place, know that it is never too
late to make a list.

TYPES OF VALUES:
• Social Values;

• Political Values;

• Religious Values;

• Work Values;

• Moral Values;

• Recreational Values;
Social Values:
Social Values consist of things like peace, justice, freedom, equality, and bettering
our community. Examples of social values include:

• Not hurting others and also standing up for those who can't stand up for
themselves;

• Being respectful and courteous in your interactions;

• Volunteering time and skills in the community;

• Being generous with what you have;

• Being honest with others;

• Participating in teamwork whenever possible

Political Values:
Although being a liberal, conservative, or moderate may determine the opinion on
how the government should run and what laws should be enacted, there are certain
political values that remain constant across political parties. American values often
include:

• Exceptionalism - that America is a land of limitless opportunities and, as such,

has a duty to act as an example to other countries;

• Capitalism and private ownership of property;

• Patriotism;

• Treating everyone equally, regardless of ethnicity, race, religion, or sexual

orientation;

• Being open-minded to new things;

• Following the law and respecting those who enforce it;

• Working hard for success

Religious Values
Religious Values centre around the expectations that people have about themselves
and others based on the beliefs of their faith. Although each faith has its beliefs,
there are common values that many faiths tend to share. Examples of religious
values include:

• Showing compassion to those in need;

• Treating others as one would like to be treated;

• Continually learning and growing both spiritually and intellectually;

• Being modest in your relations with others;

• Being respectful and nonviolent when interacting with others

Work Values:
Work Values include such things as the philosophies about the job, finances, and
how spend the money. For children, these values include how they approach school
and their education. Examples of work values include:

• Always doing the best work;

• Working in a team;

• Saving a portion of salary/allowance;

• Finding opportunities to express ideas and creativity;

• Being proud of the achievements;

• Making education a priority;

• Keeping in mind the part that job plays in society;

• Treating co-workers, fellow students, customers, and authority figures the way
that want to be treated
Moral Values:
Moral Values are the individual values about what a person think is right and wrong.
Moral values provide the foundation from which a person make decisions. Moral
values are learned from parents and experiences. Examples of moral values
include:

• Being honest and trustworthy;

• Being courageous;

• Never giving up;

• Adding value to the world;

• Being patient;

• Taking personal responsibility

Recreational Values:
Recreational Values refer to anything that involves fun and play. Recreation is
important in the family because it fosters closeness in the family, opportunities for
learning, creating memories, improving social skills, and developing empathy.
Examples of recreational values include:

• Providing unstructured play time;

• Having family game nights;

• Allowing and encouraging each family member to pursue interests;

• Taking vacations together;

• Spending time together outside playing

Tips for Making a Family's List:
Preparation of a family list of values is daunting task. However, there are several to
come up with a list. One way is starting with a family meeting and getting input from
each family member. It may take several meeting sessions to get all the thoughts
down. However, in the end, there will be a list that truly reflects a family. The
following tips are a guide to develop a list that a family can stand by:

• Writing a mission statement that addresses a core family value, whether it be

peacefully resolving conflict, being kind and loyal or working hard;
• Talk about the family., with things most important to the family; the strengths of
the family; and words or phrases best describe a family;
• Document everything, which could always go back and narrow the list later.
The first session is about brainstorming;
• Allow everyone to think about it before reconvening to agree on a list;.
• Stick to ten major ideas, a workable number to aim for without being
overwhelming;
• Display the list, somewhere where it will be seen every day;
• Refer to the list when things happen., and use it as a teaching tool.
• Rewrite as necessary, when the list may grow and evolve over time, just as the
family changes.
Additional Resources:
There are many additional resources for creating family values and many different
methods for doing so.
• The Happy Families Toolkit is extremely comprehensive, providing step-by-
step instructions for not only creating a family values list but scheduling regular
family meetings, creating daily checklists, and discussing family history. There
are sample questions to help the family determine its values;

• Creating a Positive Family Culture provides step-by-step instructions for

writing a family's mission statement - basically another term for a values list.
The article also provides samples of four different families' mission statements.
It, too, provides sample questions to help determine a family's core values;
.
• Determining Your Core Values takes the approach of figuring out values
based on what a person would like to pass down to his children. It gives step-
by-step instructions for developing a family values lists as well as examples of
values from different categories such as character, relational, spiritual, etc;
.
• Defining Family Values takes a bit of a different approach, advocating for
writing down and prioritizing valued activities and then keeping track of the time
spent on each of them. The idea is to determine if time is actually being spent
on priorities.
Sample Family Values List:
Although every family's list of values will be different, the following is an example of
a family values list:
• Think of the consequences before the act;
• Follow the guidelines of religion;
• Discuss right and wrong when modern values clash with traditional values;
• Spend time together as a family, but also pursuing individual interests;
• Live these values, not just talking about them;
• Treat others (both inside and outside of the family) with compassion and
respect;
• Put your best effort toward every task;
• Always continue to learn;
• Learn from failures;
• Celebrate successes;
• Use money to do, rather than to buy;
• Treat pets as family;
• Remember to not always act on feelings;
• Show love every day;
• Sever relationships with disrespectful people;
• Treat others' possessions with care and respect;
• Listen since all opinions are important;
• Always strive to maintain safety;
• Be honest;
A Family List Should Reflect a Particulate Family:

• A family's list should be unique to a family;

• If a spiritual family, list should be more spiritual;

• If an informal, fun-loving family, list should reflect that;

• Anything that is important for the health and well-being of a family should be a
part of the family's value list, no matter the activity or the language used to
describe it.
END