Grammar Project

Anna Rose Dorland

Professor Andaluz
English 100
 Assignment:Week 3 Practice 1 writing in class Beach of South Padre Island

Sentence Fragments
Before
It was the ocean. Waves taller than
me. Sand that felt like powder against
my warm feet. The sound of the
waves crashing. A few people were
already there to watch the sunrise.
After
The ocean waves are soaring above me,
crashing with a roar. The sand feels like
powder against my warm feet. The
beach was quiet, with only a few people
already awake to watch the sunrise.

I changed the sentence structure so that there are less fragments. I learned this from Chapter seven
of Writer’s Way. When I wrote these sentences the first time I didn’t have a particular approach on
organizing my writing. When I rewrote these sentences I used mapping(which I learned from
chapter seven). By using mapping it forced me to rethink my sequence and whether I had a
subject to form a complete sentence. 2
Wordiness Assignment:Using Imagery To Transport
Before
You are stopped dead in your tracks because you
are incisive on finding your friends in the large
flock of students. Because no one is seen you
start pushing through to the overhanging tree.
The only life this place has ever seen is found in
the center of the courtyard. The tree has
blossomed with red and green flowers. It's
holding its crooked self up with its tough brown
truck, that has names, curse words, and other
markings carved into itself.
After
You stop dead in your tracks, incisive on
finding your friends in the large flock of
students. No one is seen; you push through to
the overhanging tree. The only life this place
has seen is in the center of the courtyard. The
tree has blossomed red and green, holding
itself crooked with its tough brown truck,
carved with names, curse words, and other
markings.

In chapter four I learned about connecting your ideas. When I wrote the before paragraph I was over
connecting and adding unneeded words. I changed that by getting rid of the highlighted words. These
words included because, are, with, etc.

3
Assignment: Capturing A Moment

In chapter twelve I learned

Show Don’t Tell show don’t tell. This gave a
new perspective on my
Before After writing because I had never
The following day The glistening beams heard this phrase before.
Now by using show not tell
was my birthday. I of sun awoke me at my audience has a clear
awoke at forenoon. Not early image on my setting.
forenoon, not enough to watch the
early enough to light pink sunrise or
watch the light hear the chirping birds.
pink sunrise or I sat down on the icy,
hear the annoying off-white tile sluggishly
birds chirping, ready to open presents
now I am sitting for my birthday.
down ready to
open presents. 4
“ Conclusion

5
 Not only has this project taught me when I make grammar errors, but
now I know how to correct my mistakes. One way is by creating complete
sentences. By reading chapter seven, I learned when I use sentence
fragments and how to make complete sentences. To do this, I realized I
need a subject and a verb. If I don't have these two items, then I have
formed a sentence fragment. Another way a fragment is created is when
there is no independent clause. One writing error I use often is adding
connecting words that aren’t needed. This causes my writing to become
wordy. Chapter four taught me that I can still join my ideas without using
extra words. If I need a transition word, I can use words such as then, next,
etc., but only when needed. Chapter twelve taught me, “show don’t tell.”
This made a HUGE difference in my setting and dialogue. By recognizing
common errors In my writing, I will be able to know when to fix them. This
assignment already impacted my writing, and I will be implicating these
techniques in my essays from now on.

Word Count: 194 6