INTERPERSONAL

COMMUNICATION
PRINCIPLES
 THE PRINCIPLES OF INTERPERSONAL
COMMUNICATION
1. COMMUNICATION IS PURPOSEFUL
2. COMMUNICATION IS TRANSACTIONAL
3. COMMUNICATION IS A PACKAGE OF SIGNALS
4. COMMUNICATION IS A PROCESS OF ADJUSTMENT
5. COMMUNICATION INVOLVES CONTENT AND RELATIONSHIP DIMENSIONS
6. COMMUNICATION IS AMBIGUOUS
7. COMMUNICATION IS PUNCTUATED
8. COMMUNICATION IS INEVITABLE, IRREVERSIBLE, AND UNREPEATABLE
 1. COMMUNICATION IS PURPOSEFUL
YOU ALWAYS COMMUNICATE FOR A PURPOSE, SOME MOTIVATION LEADS YOU TO COMMUNICATE.
THERE ARE FIVE GENERAL PURPOSES THAT SEEM RELATIVELY COMMON TO MOST, IF NOT ALL FORMS
OF COMMUNICATION;
1. TO LEARN: TO ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE OF OTHERS, THE WORLD, AND YOURSELF
2. TO RELATE: TO FORM RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS, TO INTERACT WITH OTHERS AS INDIVIDUALS
3. TO HELP: TO ASSIST OTHERS BY LISTENING, OFFERING SOLUTIONS
4. TO INFLUENCE: TO STRENGTHEN OR CHANGE THE ATTITUDES OR BEHAVIOURS OF OTHERS
5. TO PLAY: TO ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE OF THE MOMENT
POPULAR BELIEF AND RESEARCH FINDINGS BOTH AGREE THAT MEN AND WOMEN USE
COMMUNICATION FOR DIFFERENT PURPOSES. GENERALLY, MEN SEEM TO COMMUNICATE MORE FOR
INFORMATION AND WOMEN DO IT MORE FOR RELATIONSHIP PURPOSES.
 2. COMMUNICATION IS TRANSACTIONAL

Communication is transactional, which means;

1. It is an-ever changing process: it is an on-going activity, in which all the
elements (speaker, listener, noise, etc.) of communication are in a state of
constant change, and this never remains static.
2. All elements are interdependent: Each element relates integrally to every
other element and influences it, i.e. a change in any one of the elements
would result in change in other elements. (E.g. you are talking in a group of
friends, your mother enters the room, audience changes, and your messages
would change accordingly).
 2. COMMUNICATION IS TRANSACTIONAL

3. IT IS INFLUENCED BY A MULTITUDE OF FACTORS: ACTIONS AND REACTIONS IN

COMMUNICATION ARE DETERMINED NOT ONLY BY WHAT IS SAID, BUT ALSO BY
THE WAY EACH PERSON INTERPRETS WHAT IS SAID (E.G. TWO PEOPLE LISTENING
TO THE SAME MESSAGE WILL OFTEN DERIVE TWO DIFFERENT MEANINGS).
4. EACH PERSON IN COMMUNICATION IS BOTH SENDER AND RECEIVER: SPEAKER
AND LISTENER SEND EACH OTHER MESSAGES AT THE SAME TIME. YOU SEND
MESSAGES WHEN YOU SPEAK BUT ALSO WHEN YOU LISTEN. EVEN YOUR ‘REFUSAL
TO COMMUNICATE’ IS ITSELF A COMMUNICATION.
3. COMMUNICATION IS A PACKAGE OF SIGNALS
Communication behaviours (verbal, nonverbal, or both) usually occur in packages.
They reinforce and support each other (e.g. you don’t express fear in words with a
relaxed body).
Contradictory messages may be the result of the desire to communicate two different
emotions/feelings (e.g. you may like a person and want to communicate a positive
feeling, but you may also feel resentment towards him and want to communicate a
negative feeling, in result, you communicate both feelings by saying you’re happy to
see him, but with a straight face).
We usually convey socially acceptable messages verbally, less socially acceptable
messages nonverbally.
 4. COMMUNICATION IS A PROCESS
OF ADJUSTMENTS
communication can take place only to the extent that the communicators use the same system
of signals. You can communicate effectively, if your language system overlaps. However, no
two persons use identical systems, so a process of adjustment is relevant to all forms of
communication (e.g. different vocabulary, cultures). Your communication skills require you to
identify the different signals and learn to interpret them.
This is most important in intercultural communication, because people from different cultures
use different signals (e.g. focused eye contact).
Communication accommodation theory holds that speakers adjust to, or accommodate to, the
speaking style of their listeners in order to gain social approval and greater communication
efficiency.
 5. COMMUNICATION INVOLVES CONTENT
AND RELATIONSHIP DIMENSIONS
Communication refers to two dimensions; real world (content) and to the relationships between the
parties.
E.g. if the employer says ‘see me after the meeting,’ its content dimension/message refers to the
behaviour response i.e. the employee sees his boss. However, its relationship message refers to how the
communication is dealt with i.e. use of this command shows difference in the status of both parties.
In any situation, content message may remain same, and the relationship dimension may change (e.g.
you better see me after the meeting (superior-inferior) or if you may please see me after the meeting
(respect and equality).
at times, the content may be different but the relationship essentially the same (e.g. a teenager might say
to his parents, “May I go away this weekend?” or “May I use the car tonight?” The content of the two
messages is clearly very different. The relationship dimension, however, is essentially the same.
 5. COMMUNICATION INVOLVES CONTENT
AND RELATIONSHIP DIMENSIONS
• IGNORING RELATIONSHIP DIMENSIONS; PROBLEMS MAY ARISE WHEN THE
DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE CONTENT AND RELATIONSHIP LEVELS OF
COMMUNICATION IS IGNORED (E.G. TWO FRIENDS MADE PLAN TO MEET EACH OTHER
FOR DINNER AND ONE OF THEM DID NOT ASK HIS PARENTS IF THAT WOULD BE FINE.
PROBABLY HIS PARENTS WOULD HAVE ALLOWED. THUS, THE ARGUMENT IS NOT AT
ALL RELATED TO THE CONTENT LEVEL. THE ARGUMENT CENTERS ON THE
RELATIONSHIP LEVEL. PARENTS EXPECTED TO BE CONSULTED ABOUT PLANS FOR THE
DINNER. NOT DOING SO REJECTED THIS DEFINITION OF THE RELATIONSHIP.
• RECOGNIZING RELATIONSHIP DIMENSIONS; PROBLEMS MAY BE AVOIDED WHEN THE
DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE CONTENT AND RELATIONSHIP LEVELS IS RECOGNIZED
(E.G. IF THE SON HAD INFORMED THE PARENTS ABOUT HIS PLANS, HE WOULD HAVE
SIMPLY GIVEN THEM THE SUPERIORITY THEY ALREADY HAVE IN THE RELATIONSHIP).
 WORD OF THE DAY

• WORD: PROACTIVE
• WORD CLASS: ADJECTIVE
• MEANING: CREATING OR CONTROLLING A
SITUATION RATHER THAN JUST RESPONDING
TO IT AFTER IT HAS HAPPENED (OF A PERSON
OR ACTION)
• SENTENCE: THE BOSS ALWAYS LIKED
MARKETING TEAM BECAUSE OF THEIR
PROACTIVE APPROACH.