THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY STILL

FACES MANY CHALLENGES

38% of openly LGBTQ people have been harassed at work.

LGBTQ adolescents are more than twice as likely to have attempted
2X suicide as their straight, cisgender peers.
trans women were killed in 2015. The 2016 number was 19 in early
21 September.
of homeless youth are LGBTQ, which is disproportionate to the
40% percentage of LGBTQ youth in the general youth population.
Because of violence, the life expectancy of a trans woman of color
35 is only 35 years old.
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE
SUPPORT, INCLUSION AND
EMPOWERMENT
TOWARDS OUR FELLOW
LGBT YOUTH?
WHAT DOES ALLY MEAN?

to join another person, group, etc., in

order to give support
Everyone has the capacity to be an ally for someone else
Ready…Set…Now what?
 ALLIES TAKE ACTION

• Accept responsibility for making a change

• Understand your privilege

• Educate yourself

• Tell others about your commitment

 IF YOU ARE STRAIGHT AND/OR CISGENDER,
UNDERSTAND YOUR PRIVILEGE
You don’t know what you don’t know. Sometimes we don’t realize we’re
not seeing the whole picture.

Take the time to learn about the issues

Protections within your organization might not be enough
Are there state laws in place that support the LGBTQ community?
 EXAMPLES OF PRIVILEGE
70% of Non-LGBTQ believe it is "unprofessional" to discuss sexual orientation
or gender identity in the workplace or in school.

And yet cisgender people never worry about their pronouns and heterosexual
people come out all the time. They don’t even think about it because their identity
is so mainstream!

Oh I loved that
My husband and I movie! My
are spending boyfriend and I saw
Christmas with his it together last
family. week!
 EDUCATE YOURSELF
• Ask Google or a friend, not an LGBTQ stranger
• Think about where you currently get your news and what
media you consume (TV Shows, magazines, books)
• Don’t rely on traditional media
• Digital community has higher LGBTQ representation
• Get to “know” more LGBTQ people & learn from people
outside your community on YouTube
• LGBT YouTube Recommendations - Vloggers Ashley Mardell,
Skylar Kergil, & Kat Blaque, PBS ‘First Person’ hosted by Kristin
Russo
• Diversify your sources of news – rather than only get your
news from major networks, read some minority-led blogs and
news-sites or articles written by LGBTQ people
 REMEMBER,

AS YOU’RE LEARNING,

IT’S OK TO MAKE MISTAKES!

 PRACTICE INCLUSION
• Clearly state your inclusive membership policy – Include a copy
on your website & recruitment handouts
• Expand your diversity efforts –
• Ensure allies play a role in your LGBTQ ORG.
• Work with your ORG to inform your website blocking policies; sometimes
appropriate, informative LGBTQ sites are blocked
• Build programs that prepare employees to become diversity and inclusion
“change agents”
• Partner with an LGBT organization (ex: oSTEM, campus LGBT group or
LGBT ERGs) to host diversity in engineering events
• Celebrate & Share LGBTQ stories – Highlight icons like Sally
Ride as a Role Model for young engineers
 MAKE YOUR LANGUAGE
INCLUSIVE
• Avoid gendering people
• Don’t assume all of your members are a certain gender
• Call your teammates “colleagues” or “members” versus saying they’re the girls/guys
• Be intentional about being inclusive
• Tell people that you “promote a positive environment where everyone is included and accepted”
• Don’t put people in boxes
• People have genders, clothes do not
• Gendered language or restrictions based on stereotypical gender roles can oppress and offend
• Example: Don’t define Formal Wear as “suits for men; dresses for women.” Instead you can define Formal
Wear as “suits and dresses”
• Avoid binary language
• “partner/spouse” instead of “wife/husband”
• “folks” instead of “ladies and gentlemen”
 BE VISIBLE
Don’t put the burden of visibility on LGBTQ people. Visibly advocate for LGBTQ inclusion

According to Catalyst, Millennials seek sponsors when they want to change jobs or feel unhappy
with their current role.
Finding someone they can relate to is important for retention.
Compile a campus/site “Out List” or “Safe Space List”

Use physical representation like ally symbols or ‘safe space’ symbols as a

conversation starter
 WHY USE PRONOUN
STICKERS?
• They prompt a conversation about gender and
raise awareness that gender is complex.
• They create a welcoming environment for
people of all genders.
• They make it easy to know which pronouns to
use when you aren't sure.
• They allow people with uncommon pronoun-
sets to communicate them easily.
 Speak up

• Take action when you see or hear something non-inclusive

 ROLE PLAY FORMAT

• Presenters will set the scene and introduce the situation

1 min

• Audience discuss with your neighbor(s) and determine how

2 min you’d handle the situation

• Review Audience Discussions/Feedback

2 min

• Presenters share recommendations

1 min
 THE ENGAGEMENT
Your colleague Ashley tells you she
got engaged over the weekend.

You ask “Oh congratulations, who’s

the lucky guy?”

She replies, “Actually, her name is

Rachel.”

How do you respond?

 HOW TO RECOVER
WHEN YOU MAKE A
MISTAKE
• Don’t ignore it but also don’t make it a big deal
• Acknowledge your mistake with a quick “sorry” and move on
with the conversation

What You Could Say Next

“Oh I’m sorry. Congratulations to you and Rachel!

What was the proposal like?’
 THE SUIT
Sally, a woman on your team,
arrives at a formal corporate
function wearing this

The other women on your team are

wearing gowns.

One of your customers points to

Sally and asks “is that gentleman
on your team?”

How do you proceed?

 HOW TO RESPOND WHEN
SOMEONE IS MISGENDERED

• Say their name, correct the pronoun and introduce the person by giving some detail about
the person that is not related to their attire or gender.
• Share some of their accomplishments, interests, education background, etc. just like you
would when introducing a gender-conforming person

What You Could Say Next

“Oh that’s Sally, yes she joined our team last year. She handles all our customer accounts and
is an engineering grad from UD just like you! Let me introduce you two.”
 THE GOSSIP
Last week, your teammate Jim came out to you as transgender and asked you
to start using “She/Her” pronouns and her new name – Janet. You’re an ally
so she also asked you to be one of her champions, so that if someone else
has questions, you can help.

Today, Alex, one of your other colleagues,

comes to your office and says “Did you hear
Jim wants to be called Janet and thinks he’s a
woman?”

As someone with all the facts, how do

you respond to Alex’s question?
 HOW TO BE A CHAMPION FOR
SOMEONE WHO IS COMING OUT AS
TRANSGENDER
• You don’t know where Alex heard this news – so start by clarifying whether Alex heard this directly from Janet or
if they heard this through the grapevine. If they heard it through the grapevine, you may want to address the gossip.
Especially if you’re a supervisor you want to know how others in your workgroup are dealing with the news.
• Realize that Alex may not intend for their comments to be confrontational, they might be feeling you out to see
how you react. Use the opportunity to be a role model.
• Respond to Alex’s use of “he” pronouns and the name “Jim”
• Explain to Alex that Janet has asked to be referred to with “she” pronouns, not “he” pronouns and that Alex should respect
and honor Janet’s request. Using the right name and pronouns shows that you respect a person’s identity.
• Use this as a Teachable Moment
• Describe the difference between assigned at birth sex and gender identity and the importance of respecting one’s gender
identity
• Help Alex to understand why it’s important to use the correct pronouns
• Discourage the use of Janet’s birth name (Jim) if she’s outright asked you to call her Janet
• Ask Alex if they have any questions about transgender identities that you can help answer. Point them in the
direction of helpful resources if they want to learn more.
 THE BREAK ROOM
In the break room while you’re getting coffee,
a group of people are talking near the
watercooler.

You overhear Casey tell the group a

homophobic joke. Most people are laughing.

What do you do?

 HOW TO SPEAK UP AGAINST
BIAS
Use Facts
• Explain why a word or phrase is considered a slur (ie: provide
the history or explain why it’s insulting)
• What You Could Say Next: “Using ‘That’s gay’ to mean that
something is bad or stupid is hurtful . Gay doesn’t mean
stupid.”
Make it About You
• What You Could Say Next: “I consider myself a straight ally
and what you said isn’t ok with me because I don’t like to hear
a group of people being stereotyped and disrespected like
that.”
Make your Comment Relatable
• What You Could Say Next: “How would you feel if someone
told that joke about you or one of your family members?”
 THE FIRST DAY OF CLASS
It’s the first day of class on campus. After going through the
class roster your professor says she would like to know if
you have a preferred name that she should use in class.

A fellow student stands up and informs the teacher and class

that neither male nor female pronouns are preferred. Instead
your classmate explains a preference for only being called
Kem and goes on to explain that this particular spelling of
Kem was selected because it feels androgynous.

Now you are asked to pair up with the person on your right
for an icebreaker. Kem is your partner and you are afraid of
making a mistake.

What do you do?

 THE FIRST DAY OF CLASS – PART
2
You are the class professor and your student Kem has just
announced a preference to not be called by male or female
pronouns.

The university requires that you fill out a form that indicates
the gender of your students so that they can keep track of
minority representation in the department.

Kem’s facial features would lead you to assume one gender,

but Kem’s gender expression causes you to think a different
gender. The form only offers the selections of male and
female.

What do you do?

 THE CLOSETED
ENGINEER
An operator who reports to you tells you that she
needs to take Family Medical Leave to care for her
ill wife.

She’s not out to the rest of her teammates as

lesbian and is afraid to tell them.

She asks you how she should deal with the

situation, how do you support her and coach
your team?
 HOW TO BE SUPPORTIVE OF YOUR
LGBTQ COLLEAGUE / EMPLOYEE
• Let her know you support her and understand that this is a stressful time for her.
• Give her relevant information about how to take Family Leave to take care of
her wife.
• Offer to be her champion and help her if she wants to come out or diffuse
questions from her work group if she does not want to come out.

What You Could Say Next

“I’m so sorry to hear that your wife is sick, I know that when a loved one is ill it
can be very stressful. Let me show you the process for applying for Family
Leave.
Now, if you want others to know, I’m happy to be your champion and help
support you through the coming out experience. If you don’t want to come out to
the group, that’s also fine and I support you regardless.
 GOING FORWARD
• Come out as an ally. 
• Educate yourself on the issues & learn how to speak up
against hate.
• Don’t be afraid to make mistakes.
• Realize that being an ally is a verb and demands action. 
• Help change the statistics and make the world more
inclusive.
THANK YOU! QUESTIONS?