Whose Thoughts are These anyway?

Instructions: Think about each of the three situations listed in the chart below. For each, write down all
messages that come to mind in the column “message.” In the column “source” write down where you
think these messages come from. Are they messages you received from others (friends, family, teachers),
or are they your own thoughts? Write your answers in your e-journal/notebook.

1. You feel pressured to do whatever it takes to earn a high grade

Message Source

Only the best performers get Parents

into top colleges
2. Your friends want you to join them in experimenting with drinking liquor
Message Source

I’ll do just anything to fit Me

in.

3. Senior’s Prom is just around the corner

Message Source

To look great, I need to get Friends

down to a size “zero”
The Power Triad: Thoughts, Feelings and Actions
Situation
We all receive messages about a given situation – both messages from
others and messages we send ourselves. The more clearly we can label
these messages, the less likely they are to drive the cycle in an
unhealthy direction.

Thoughts
We can retrain our brains to identify automatic thoughts which can be
negative or unhelpful, interrupt them and replace them with more
constructive coping thoughts.

Malcognitions – these root from hurtful or unpleasant experiences

that lost emotional attachment through time and became statements
that we act in accordance with.
Feelings
Learning to name and rate our moods and cultivating mindfulness
can help us to connect to our emotions, rather than being dictated to
by them. Relaxation techniques can help ease the feelings of stress
and anxiety that can keep us stuck in unhealthy behaviors.

Behaviors
When we are down, we tend to be less active; the less we do, the less
we want to do, and the more we continue to feel down.

Overt behavior – is expressed consciously like replying to a friend

or volunteering for class recitation.

Covert behavior – occurs beyond our awareness, in our blind spot.

Mannerisms, body language, gestures and personal tendencies fall
here.
Difference between Thoughts, Feelings, and Behavior
Thoughts: Your internal summary or prediction about a situation or event.
Examples:
“This is going to be a disaster”.
“This is going to be great”.
“Everyone’s going to laugh at me”.

Feelings: One word summaries of internal emotional states.

Examples:
Nervous
Scared
Excited

Behaviors: Can be both inward (invisible) and outward (observable).

Examples:
Tensing muscles
Skipping class
Turning down an invitation to a party
Jumping off a diving board
 The Story of the Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside
people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all“ "It is a terrible fight
and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed,
arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He
continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness,
benevolence, empathy generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on
inside you – and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which
wolf will win?“ The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed".
 Q and A: Reflection

1. What do the two wolves symbolize?

2. What is the meaning of the same fight is going on inside you and inside every other
person too?
3. What do you mean by the grandfather’s answer the one you feed?
4. What is the moral lesson of the story of the two wolves?
 Few ways that we can feed the good wolf:

1. Practice forgiveness for yourself and others

2. Compliment others when deserved
3. Make the best out of every situation
4. Improve your self-esteem
5. Regulate your emotions
6. Get professional help
 Apply what you have learned
Instruction: Describe a situation you recently experienced that was difficult for you (either
upsetting or made you nervous).

2. ___________________

1. ___________________ 3. ___________________

4. ___________________