Understanding self

and others
The self
 Answers the question ‘who am I?’
 Meanings attached to a person by self and
others that are based on personal
characteristics and on people’s social roles and
membership in various groups
 Person can have multiple selves stemming from
a variety of identities (Self-pluralism)
 Ideal/possible self
The self
 Product of
 What you are
 What society expects you to be
 What experiences you have and how you deal
with them
Self-presentation/impression
management: Revealing yourself to
others
 Self-consciousness – the process of knowing
oneself
 Self monitoring - what do you present and why
 Presenting your true self - makes one
vulnerable, so we prefer to act according to
social expectations, wear masks and remain
enigmas
 Assumption of maturity and sensitivity
 Of course, sometimes even we do not know our true
selves (cf self-consciousness)
Johari window
 The most useful model to describe the process
of human interaction, more specifically of giving
and receiving feedback
 Model depicts communication windows through
which feedback is given and received
 Through feedback and disclosure, you can
reveal more about yourself to others and learn
more about yourself from others
 Johari window model

Known Ask Unknown

by self by self

1 2

Feedback solicitation
Known blind
by others open/free/public arena area
area

Tell
Self- disclosure/exposure Shared
Discovery Others’ observation

Unknown hidden/facade Self-discovery unknown

by others area area

3 4
Principles of change in the Johari
window
 A change in one quadrant affects other
quadrants
 It takes energy to hide/deny/be blind to
behaviour that is involved in interaction
 Trust increases awareness
 Forced awareness is undesirable and
usually ineffective
 The smaller the open area, the poorer the
communication
 Interpersonal learning means a change has
taken place so the Q1 is larger and one or
more of the other quadrants also has grown
smaller.
 Working with others is facilitated by a large
enough area of free activity. An increased Q1
means more of the resources and skills in the
relationships can be applied to a task.
 There is universal curiosity about the Unknown
area, but is held in check by custom, social
training and diverse fears.
 Sensitivity means appreciating the covert
aspect of behaviour, in quadrant 2, 3 and 4,
and respecting the desire of others to keep
them so.
 Under Condition of Self Disclosure

2
1

3 4

Under Condition of Feedback

1 2

3 4

Under Condition of Self Disclosure and Feedback

1 2

3 4

http://saweb.weber.edu/elibrary/StructuredExperience/PDF/P-FB/P-FB-1.pdf
Initial phase of group interaction

Open
Blind
H
i
d
d Unknown
e
n
Later phase of group interaction

Blind
Open

Unknown

Hidden
Feedback
 Purpose of feedback
 Helps us see ourselves as others see us
 Others learn how we see them
 In so doing, it helps us move towards our
goals
 Presupposes a caring, trusting
environment
 Which reduces defensiveness
 Which maximises personal growth
 The desire for feedback is often off-set by the fear
of asking for such information
The appropriate way
 Feedback should be given such that the person
receiving it
 Hears it in the most objective, least distorted way
possible
 Understands it
 Retains the choice of using/not using it
 People need to be trained to give feedback
 Should be given such that the recipient preserves
his/her self-esteem
 Indirect versus direct expression of feelings
 Indirect
is safer because it is ambiguous and offers an
escape from commitment and rejection
 Description versus interpretation of behaviour
 Description focuses on observable aspects whereas
interpretation involves attributing intention and could
be wrong
 Non-evaluative versus evaluative feedback
 Non-evaluative looks at behaviour rather than
personal worth and refrains from value-judgments
 Specific versus general feedback
 Specific gives you an opportunity to know what to
change
 Freedom of choice to change versus
pressure to change
 Freedom of choice to change means that the
decision to act on the feedback is voluntary
rather than imposed
 Immediate versus delayed timing
 Immediate feedback is most effective since
memory is vivid
 External versus group feedback
 Contingent on circumstances
 Solicited versus imposed feedback
 Solicited is more useful since recipient is open
 Modifiable versus unmodifiable behaviour
 Conscious desire to change is critical
 Motivation to help versus motivation to
hurt
 Displacement and projection precipitate harm
and conflict
 Data-based versus impressionistic
 Positive and negative versus completely
negative
 Suggestive versus prescriptive
 Constructive versus destructive
Receiving feedback
 Elicit versus wait
 Listening and self-analysis versus denial
and rationalisation
 Clarifying versus assuming
Benefits of knowing oneself
 Self-awareness promotes personal
growth, which in turn enhances overall
functioning (including work performance)
Self-consciousness: The process of
knowing oneself
 Existentialist orientation coupled with
personal courage and conviction
 Conducive socio-cultural environment
 Living comfortably with complexity and
contradiction
 Willingness and ability to change
 Time and energy for introspection
 Johari Window: The Open-Receptive Person

Known To Self Unknown To Self

Known To Others

Open/Public Blind Spot

Unknown To Others

Hidden/Facade Area Unknown

The open-receptive person has a large public area, reflecting someone who is open about
him/herself and receptive to feedback from others. This is the person who has a clear self-image
and enough confidence in who he/she is to be visible to others. If in a management role, the open-
receptive person has employees who tend to feel respected and encouraged to grow.
 Johari Window: The Pumper
Known To Self Unknown To Self

Known To Others Open/Public Blind Spot

Unknown To Others
Hidden/Facade Area Unknown

The pumper has a large hidden area, reflecting someone who keeps information with him/herself.
This is a person who is always asking for information and giving little in return – the game player. If
the pumper is in a management role, employees tend to feel defensive with and resentful of this
individual.
 Johari Window: The Blabbermouth
Known To Self Unknown To Self

Known To Others

Open/
Blind Spot
Public

Unknown To Others

Hidden/
Facade Unknown
Area

The blabbermouth has a large blind area, reflecting someone who talks a lot but does not listen
too well. This is the person who is pre-occupied with him/herself and doesn't know when to keep
quiet. If the blabbermouth is in a management role, employees tend to get annoyed with this
person and eventually will either actively or passively learn to shut him/her up.
 Johari Window: The Hermit
Known To Self Unknown To Self

Open/
Known To Others Blind Spot
Public

Hidden/
Unknown To Others Facade Unknown
Area

The hermit has a large unknown area, reflecting a lack of self-knowledge and understanding. This
is a person you can’t figure out. The hermit’s behaviour tends to be unpredictable and security-
oriented. If in a management role, employees tend to feel insecure and confused about
expectations.