Unit 5

Week 1
Plan plot, characters and structure effectively in
writing an extended story.
Read a story together in which the events are told out of sequence.

Ask learners to show the order in which the events in the story were told
and to compare it with the order in which they happened.

Ask learners to think of another story (or a variation on the one you have
shared) in which it would make sense for the events to be told out of
sequence. They plot the events in boxes and then explore different ways
of sequencing the boxes.

Learners tell their story to a response partner before they begin to write
it to receive feedback on whether the order they plan to use makes sense
 When should one *not* present events in
chronological order?
1. Flashbacks are great when something doesn't
make sense out of the context of what is
happening now in the story, or when something
that happened long ago (before the story's
timeline begins) is important to the story.
2. The story begins at a point where it is very
hard to introduce the characters well, so I
started at a point after that, then transitioned to
a flashback on how they got to that point.
You need to sometimes describe events that
happened a long time in the past, so that you
present them as sources or motives for events in
the present.
 A nonlinear narrative.
When the woodsman saw the tracks in the mud, he knew something wasn’t right. The forest was
too quiet and both sets were fresh, meaning the second set could only have been a moment or
two behind the first. Shouldering his axe, he ran down the path just as a scream ripped the air.

Clancy loved her Grandma and tried to visit her whenever she could. It was spring, but it was not
warm enough to leave home without her cloak, a red, hooded cape that her mother had made
her. She prepared a basket of goodies for her grandma who hadn’t been feeling very well lately.
She kissed her mother good-bye and set off into the forest, but not before her mother warned
her to go directly to Grandma’s and not to dawdle or talk to strangers.

Wow. Grandma looks worse than ever, Clancy thought when she spotted her bonneted
grandmother peeking out at her from under the bed covers. Strange, too, that Grandma had not
opened the door for Clancy, but rather called out in a hoarse voice to enter. Usually her grandma
left the front door locked, but because Clancy had been late (she’d been distracted during her
journey) her grandmother had probably grown tired of waiting and unlocked the door before
lying in bed.
The day was truly glorious, and after only a few minutes of walking, Clancy
pulled her hood down. The sun peaked through the forest canopy and shafts
of sunlight spotlighted little groups of wild flowers. Clancy yearned to pick
some, but remembered her mother’s edict to go straight, so she walked on.

As Clancy approached the bed, she could see that her grandmother really
wasn’t herself today. Her hands, wrinkly and small on any other day, were
large—perhaps swollen—and covered in hair. “Gran, I brought you some
flowers,” she ventured. Grandma just looked at her with wide eyes.
Grandmother’s bonnet, too, looked stretched, and two lumps protruded on
the sides. When Clancy reached the bedside, her grandmother suddenly smile
a wide, toothy grin that Clancy had never seen on her nearly toothless old
grandma; she exclaimed, “Grandma, what big teeth you have!”
As she neared her Grandmother’s house, Clancy paused for a moment to loosen her
red cape. She was quite warm from the walk and needed to cool down. She put
down her basket and started to undo the lace at the neck, when a thick, growling
voice interrupted her. “Where are you off to this fine day?”

Grandma was setting the table when she heard a knock on the door. It wasn’t like
Clancy to be early, but she figured her granddaughter had perhaps left early
because it was so nice out. No sooner had she opened the door than she found
herself surrounded by giant teeth.

“Oh!” said Clancy, “I’m off to see my grandmother.” She’d been taken off guard by
the hairy creature that had silently emerged only a few feet from her. “I’d better get
going though.” She grabbed the basket and started to walk on, but the creature
said. “Oh really? How nice. I’m sure she’d love some of these flowers.”
“Well, yes, I had thought that, too, but I promised I’d…”

“Oh, it’ll just take a minute and no one would know. I bet your granny would love
them.” At this, the creature wiped some drool from his lip and blinked hard.

Maybe just a few then.”

When the cottage door burst open, Wolf was still trying to get the grandmothers
tight nightgown over his bulging gut. He knew he was done for when he looked
up to see the man and the axe coming straight towards him. He had one final
thought as the blade split his belly, and little girl and her grandmother emerged
from the gaping hole left by the axe:

I should have chewed my food...

Write
 Use paragraphs, sequencing and linking them appropriately to
support overall development of the text.

Before learners begin to write:

• ask them to make a flow chart recording the main
ideas in each paragraph
• remind them of the need to use paragraphs carefully
to structure the pace of the story.

Before they begin to write, revisit the work you have

done in previous terms when discussing the importance
of opening and closing statements and events in a story.
Paragraphs & Topic Sentences.
A paragraph is a series of sentences that are organized and coherent, and
are all related to a single topic. Almost every piece of writing you do that is
longer than a few sentences should be organized into paragraphs. This is
because paragraphs show a reader where the subdivisions of an essay begin
and end, and thus help the reader see the organization of the essay and
grasp its main points.
Paragraphs can contain many different kinds of information. A paragraph
could contain a series of brief examples or a single long illustration of a
general point. It might describe a place, character, or process; narrate a
series of events; compare or contrast two or more things; classify items into
categories; or describe causes and effects. Regardless of the kind of
information they contain, all paragraphs share certain characteristics. One
of the most important of these is a topic sentence.
Topic sentences
A well-organized paragraph supports or develops a single controlling idea,
which is expressed in a sentence called the topic sentence. A topic sentence
has several important functions: it substantiates or supports an essay’s
thesis statement; it unifies the content of a paragraph and directs the order
of the sentences; and it advises the reader of the subject to be discussed
and how the paragraph will discuss it. Readers generally look to the first few
sentences in a paragraph to determine the subject and perspective of the
paragraph. That’s why it’s often best to put the topic sentence at the very
beginning of the paragraph. In some cases, however, it’s more effective to
place another sentence before the topic sentence—for example, a sentence
linking the current paragraph to the previous one, or one providing
background information.
Although most paragraphs should have a topic sentence, there are a few
situations when a paragraph might not need a topic sentence. For example,
you might be able to omit a topic sentence in a paragraph that narrates a
series of events, if a paragraph continues developing an idea that you
introduced (with a topic sentence) in the previous paragraph, or if all the
sentences and details in a paragraph clearly refer—perhaps indirectly—to a
main point. The vast majority of your paragraphs, however, should have a
topic sentence.
Paragraph structure.
Most paragraphs in an essay have a three-part structure—
introduction, body, and conclusion. You can see this structure in
paragraphs whether they are narrating, describing, comparing,
contrasting, or analyzing information. Each part of the paragraph plays
an important role in communicating your meaning to your reader.
Introduction: the first section of a paragraph; should include the topic
sentence and any other sentences at the beginning of the paragraph
that give background information or provide a transition.
Body: follows the introduction; discusses the controlling idea, using
facts, arguments, analysis, examples, and other information.
Conclusion: the final section; summarizes the connections between
the information discussed in the body of the paragraph and the
paragraph’s controlling idea.
The following paragraph illustrates this pattern of organization. In this paragraph
the topic sentence and concluding sentence (CAPITALIZED) both help the reader
keep the paragraph’s main point in mind.

SCIENTISTS HAVE LEARNED TO SUPPLEMENT THE SENSE OF SIGHT IN NUMEROUS

WAYS. In front of the tiny pupil of the eye they put, on Mount Palomar, a great
monocle 200 inches in diameter, and with it see 2000 times farther into the
depths of space. Or they look through a small pair of lenses arranged as a
microscope into a drop of water or blood, and magnify by as much as 2000
diameters the living creatures there, many of which are among man’s most
dangerous enemies. Or, if we want to see distant happenings on earth, they use
some of the previously wasted electromagnetic waves to carry television images
which they re-create as light by whipping tiny crystals on a screen with electrons
in a vacuum. Or they can bring happenings of long ago and far away as coloured
motion pictures, by arranging silver atoms and colour-absorbing molecules to
force light waves into the patterns of original reality. Or if we want to see into the
center of a steel casting or the chest of an injured child, they send the information
on a beam of penetrating short-wave X rays, and then convert it back into images
we can see on a screen or photograph. THUS ALMOST EVERY TYPE OF
ELECTROMAGNETIC RADIATION YET DISCOVERED HAS BEEN USED TO EXTEND
OUR SENSE OF SIGHT IN SOME WAY.
Use transition words or phrases between sentences and between paragraphs.
The following paragraph shows how carefully chosen transitions (CAPITALIZED)
lead the reader smoothly from the introduction to the conclusion of the
paragraph.

I don’t wish to deny that the flattened, minuscule head of the large-bodied
"stegosaurus" houses little brain from our subjective, top-heavy perspective,
BUT I do wish to assert that we should not expect more of the beast. FIRST OF
ALL, large animals have relatively smaller brains than related, small animals.
The correlation of brain size with body size among kindred animals (all
reptiles, all mammals, FOR EXAMPLE) is remarkably regular. AS we move from
small to large animals, from mice to elephants or small lizards to Komodo
dragons, brain size increases, BUT not so fast as body size. IN OTHER WORDS,
bodies grow faster than brains, AND large animals have low ratios of brain
weight to body weight. IN FACT, brains grow only about two-thirds as fast as
bodies. SINCE we have no reason to believe that large animals are consistently
stupider than their smaller relatives, we must conclude that large animals
require relatively less brain to do as well as smaller animals. IF we do not
recognize this relationship, we are likely to underestimate the mental power
of very large animals, dinosaurs in particular.
To show addition:
again, and, also, besides, equally important, first (second, etc.), further, furthermore,
in addition, in the first place, moreover, next, too
To give examples:
for example, for instance, in fact, specifically, that is, to illustrate
To compare:
also, in the same manner, likewise, similarly
To contrast:
although, and yet, at the same time, but, despite, even though, however, in contrast,
in spite of, nevertheless, on the contrary, on the other hand, still, though, yet
To summarize or conclude:
all in all, in conclusion, in other words, in short, in summary, on the whole, that is,
therefore, to sum up
To show time:
after, afterward, as, as long as, as soon as, at last, before, during, earlier, finally,
formerly, immediately, later, meanwhile, next, since, shortly, subsequently, then,
thereafter, until, when, while
To show place or direction:
above, below, beyond, close, elsewhere, farther on, here, nearby, opposite, to the left
(north, etc.)
To indicate logical relationship:
accordingly, as a result, because, consequently, for this reason, hence, if, otherwise,
since, so, then, therefore, thus
Week 2
Manage the development of an idea throughout a
piece of writing, e.g. link the end to the beginning.
Once learners have planned their story, they begin to write it. Generate/share the
success criteria:
• tell a story in which the events are out of chronological sequence
• use paragraphs successfully to structure their story and control the pace of
development
• include a variety of sentence structures to interest the reader and control the
information given and the pace of the story.
Once learners have written their first draft, ask them to do the writer’s mumble
and read the story aloud several times to check:
• the text meets the success criteria
• the story makes sense and the events follow each other logically
• their choice of words (Can they improve the quality of the verbs and the choice
of nouns?)
• punctuation / spelling.
Once learners have planned their story, they begin to write it. Generate/share the success
criteria:

• tell a story in which the events are out of

chronological sequence
• use paragraphs successfully to structure their
story and control the pace of development
• include a variety of sentence structures to
interest the reader and control the information
given and the pace of the story.
Once you have written your first draft, ask them to do the writer’s mumble and read the
story aloud several times to check:

• the text meets the success criteria

• the story makes sense and the events follow
each other logically
• their choice of words (Can they improve the
quality of the verbs and the choice of nouns?)
• punctuation / spelling.
 Use a range of devices to support cohesion
within paragraphs.
Before learners begin to write remind them of
the work you have previously done on how
paragraphs are related to time passing. Ask
them to note on their paragraph plan how they
plan to link the paragraphs. They write down the
actual words and phrases they plan to use. If
they are moving time within a paragraph, ask
them to record the words and phrases they plan
to use for those occasions too.
I was re-reading Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone recently to
get a feel for the way J.K. Rowling passes an entire year in a fairly
short book that feels content packed, and I noticed something
very common which I hadn't previously put any thought to.
With respect to the passage of time, the book's voice changes
drastically here and there. For many pages it follows the second-
to-second real-time actions of the character, e.g. a passage
describing a conversation or a duel.
But at other times the narrator zooms out and passes hours in a
sentence, like so:
"Hermione didn't turn up for the next class and wasn't seen all
afternoon."
 5 Ways To Handle The Passing Of Time In
Your Story
It's important to organise ideas and give your
writing a strong structure. This means having a
clear beginning, middle and ending and
organising your paragraphs by TiPToP. Tip Top: TIme
change, Place change, new TOpic, new Person).
 Lets look at:

Beginnings
Middles
Endings
Structure
Structure and paragraphs test
 Beginnings
The beginning, or opening, is one of the most important sections of your writing. It should
grab the reader's attention and make them want to read on. For instance, which is the
best beginning for a ghost story?
a) The house was built in 1975. It was a typical semi-detached, but it did have quite an
impressive front door. Most of the windows were double glazed and the garden was quite
neat.
b) The creaking door swung open to reveal an empty hall. Ben shivered as he stepped
inside, his footsteps echoing on the cold tile floor.
There are no prizes for guessing that the second one is scarier. Of course, if you were
trying to describe the house and nothing else, then the first extract is better, because it
tells us more.
So you need to think about TAP (text, audience and purpose) and make a good start to
your writing. You should try to 'set a context', which is like setting the scene. So if it's a
speech, you might start by asking people a question and getting them to think. But if it's a
newspaper article, you need to write what happened and where it happened very early
on.
A persuasive letter to local residents
a) The subject I am going to write about today is why the local park should
not be closed.
b) Have you ever stopped to wonder how many hundreds of people make
regular use of our Memorial Park?
A newspaper report on a meeting
a) It is unlikely that newspaper readers who enjoy all the things that our
park has to offer will want it to disappear forever under tons of concrete.
b) 'Ashfield Park will be ruined,' claim protestors who held a meeting last
night to organise opposition to the council's plans for a car park.
It should be clear that the "b" versions are better - they fit the style and
show that the writer has used TAP to make their writing work. Remember -
you need to make it interesting right from the start.
 Middles
This is the heart of your piece - it contains the key
points and will probably have three, four or five
paragraphs. You should have one basic idea in each
one, and the paragraph explains this, develops it and
makes it relevant for your readers.
So paragraphs are like stepping stones - they lead the
reader from one end of your writing to the other. But
when do you start a new paragraph? Well some
people like using TiPToP, so let's see how this works.
 TiPToP
Ti - stands for Time, so start a new paragraph for
a different time period.
P - stands for Place, so start a new paragraph for
each new place.
To - stands for Topic, so start a new paragraph
for each new topic, idea or subject.
P - stands for Person, so start a new paragraph
for each new speaker.
 Endings
This can be another tricky area - you shouldn't just stop writing. Instead,
make the ending memorable.
There are many different ways of doing this. If it's a ghost story, you can
leave it unsure and open, as if something else might happen next. Like
this…
He turned away just as a shadow rose up from the bricks. Was it a trick of
the light? Or something else?
In other pieces, you need to come to a definite answer, like this…
Once the trees are chopped down and the play equipment bulldozed
away it will be too late. Too late to save our park. Too late to think about
our children. And too late to remember those who died for our freedom.
So act now to safeguard this valuable, beautiful area for the future.
 Structure
Now you've had a chance to practise beginnings, middles, endings
and paragraphs, you should have a clearer idea of how to organise
your work.
Remember:
You need to organise and structure your work. It should be in clear,
appropriate steps. If it's muddled, it will confuse the reader.
Think about the beginning - will it interest other people? Will it make
them sit up and take notice?
TiPToP your paragraphs. That means a new paragraph for a new time,
place, topic or person.
The ending is not just when you stop writing - you need to make it
memorable and as interesting as the start.
 Structure and paragraphs test.
1. You've just asked if you can go down to the park to meet your friends and have been
given the following answer:
"You're not going anywhere near that place. It's full of litter, it's never supervised and
the equipment is a total health hazard! You'll have to find somewhere else to hang
around."
Write a letter to Mrs H Devonshire, Parks Department, complaining about the area and
requesting that something is done about it.
Below are five ideas for paragraphs that you could include in your letter. They are not in
the best order, so drag and drop them to improve the structure. Drag the idea into the
best place in the table below:
Hope improvements can be completed soon
Teenagers can frighten the children and no-one supervises them
Say who I am / why I'm writing / where the place is
Need proper attendants / railings / new equipment / notices
Danger to young children from litter and broken swings
Week 3
 Use connectives to structure an argument or discussion.
Use a wide range of connectives to clarify relationships between ideas, e.g. however, therefore, although.

Learners should be able to identify main and subordinate clauses. Demonstrate

how changing the order of the clauses subtly changes the meaning of a sentence.
• Make sure they know how to punctuate complex sentences.
• Explore the impact of a sentence by changing the connective in the sentence.
• Extend understanding of shades of meaning to connectives. Although a group of
connectives may be linked as ‘additional information’ connectives, their meanings
are often subtly different. They need to understand and use a wider range of
connectives in clarifying relationships between ideas, e.g. however, therefore,
although.
• Learners also need to learn that certain connectives are associated with different
text types and use them to structure the text, e.g. furthermore, nevertheless and
moreover are associated with persuasive/argument texts, and similarly, whereas
and on the other hand are associated more with discursive texts.
 Main and subordinate clauses.
A subordinate clause—also called a dependent
clause—will begin with a subordinate
conjunction or a relative pronoun and will
contain both a subject and a verb. This
combination of words will not form a complete
sentence. It will instead make a reader want
additional information to finish the thought.
 Subordinate Conjunctions

after once until

although provided that when
as rather than whenever
because since where
before so that whereas
even if than wherever
even though that whether
if though while
in order that unless why
 Relative Pronouns

that who whose

which whoever whosever
whichever whom whomever
Remember this important point: A subordinate
clause cannot stand alone as a sentence because
it does not provide a complete thought. The
reader is left wondering, "So what happened?"
A word group that begins with a capital letter
and ends with a period must contain at least one
main clause. Otherwise, you will have written a
fragment, a major error.
When a six-foot snake slithered across the
sidewalk, Rhonda gasped.
Main clause……… Independent clause

Subordinate clause…… dependent clause

 How to punctuate complex sentences.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LhVWNXHI
710
 Changing the order of the clauses subtly
changes the meaning of a sentence.
A complex sentence contains a main clause and a subordinate clause.
We carried on walking, although we were exhausted.

The main clause (we carried on walking) makes sense on its own; the
subordinate clause (although we were exhausted) begins with a connective
and does not make sense on its own.

The clauses can be switched round so that the subordinate clause comes
first.
Although we were exhausted, we carried on walking.

This has the effect of changing the emphasis of the sentence, and highlights
our exhaustion rather than the fact that we were walking.
Extend understanding of shades of meaning to connectives. Although a group
of connectives may be linked as ‘additional information’ connectives, their
meanings are often subtly different.
Certain connectives are associated with different text types and
use them to structure the text, e.g. furthermore, nevertheless
and moreover are associated with persuasive/argument texts,
and similarly, whereas and on the other hand are associated
more with discursive texts.
 Punctuate speech and use apostrophes
accurately.
Learners need to secure accuracy in:
• punctuating direct speech
• making appropriate use of the apostrophe in
contractions and to show possession, but not in possessive
pronouns or plurals – focus on it’s and its.

Introduce through reading:

• the colon and semi-colon
• different ways of marking parenthetical information
(asides), i.e. brackets, parenthetical commas and dashes.
 Punctuating direct speech
1. Speech marks (“ ”) are used to show what is
spoken aloud by a character.
E.g. “Hello. How are you?” said Billy.
2. You start the speech marks before the first word
spoken.
E.g. He walked out and said, “Good to see you.”
3. You close the speech marks after the last word
they speak not at the end of each sentence.
E.g. “Would you like something to drink?” Dan asked.
4. When someone new speaks you must start a new line.
E.g. “Thank you. Do you have any cola?” Billy requested.
“Of course,” Dan answered.
5. The first word of a new piece of speech must have a capital letter.
E.g. Billy smiled and said, “Perfect!”
6. The same rules of punctuation must be used in speech such as
commas and question marks.
E.g. “Do you want ice?” he continued.
7. You must always use punctuation to separate what is being
spoken and the rest of the writing.
E.g. “No ice thank you,” Billy concluded.
 Its? It's? Or Its'?
Its' is never correct. Your grammar and spellchecker
should flag it for you. Always change it to one of the
forms below.
It's is the contraction (abbreviated form) of "it is" and "it
has." It's has no other meanings--only "it is" and "it has."
Its is the form to use in all other instances when you
want a form of i-t-s but you are not sure which one. Its is
a possessive form; that is, it shows ownership the same
way Javier's or Santosh's does.
Example: The radio station has lost its license.
 The colon and semi-colon

The colon.

One common use of the colon is to introduce a list of items. For example:
To make the perfect jam sandwich you need three things: some bread,
butter and strawberry jam.
Three items are listed in the sentence above. The first part of the
sentence informs the reader that there will be three things; then the colon
tells the reader “here are the three items”.

A colon can also be used to introduce a definition, statement or

explanation of something. For example:
I know how I’m going to handle this: I’m going to hide!
Penguin (noun): an aquatic, flightless bird found almost exclusively in the
Antarctic.
The semicolon.
The most common use of the semicolon is to join together two
clauses that could each be separate sentences — creating a
longer sentence. For example:
John calls it football; Sam calls it soccer.

The semicolon is also commonly used to join two clauses,

changing the sentence in combination with words like 
‘therefore’, ‘however’ or ‘on the other hand’. The examples
below illustrate this approach:
however
Sian is Welsh; however, she lives in Canada.
in addition
He likes to play video games; in addition, he likes to read
classical literature.
otherwise
You should stop drinking too much alcohol; otherwise, you’re
going to get into trouble.
 Different ways of marking parenthetical
information.
Brackets, parenthetical commas and dashes.
Brackets add extra, unimportant, information to
a sentence or explain the meaning of a term.

A parenthesis is additional information in a

sentence. If a parenthesis is removed, the
sentence still makes sense. For example:
There are two forms of dashes: em and en
Em Dashes
Em dashes save the day when other punctuation
would be awkward. For instance, em dashes can
replace parentheses at the end of a sentence or when
multiple commas appear in a parenthetical phrase.
After a split second of hesitation, the second baseman
leaped for the ball (or, rather, limped for it).
After a split second of hesitation, the second baseman
leaped for the ball—or, rather, limped for it.
Using the En Dash to Indicate Spans of Time or
Ranges of Numbers
The en dash is often used to indicate spans of
time or ranges of numbers. In this context, the
dash should be interpreted as meaning either
“to” or “through.” Consider the examples
below:
The teacher assigned pages 101–181 for
tonight’s reading material.