Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Conflict Resolution
Conflict Resolution
Conflict Resolution
Agenda
• Defining conflict
• Source of conflict
• What is your conflict style?
• Conflict resolution
• Conflict escalators
• Conflict reducers
• Key elements
• Key phrases
Defining Conflict
Defining Conflict
- An expressed struggle between at least
two interdependent parties who perceive
incompatible goals, scarce rewards, and
interference from the other party in
achieving their goals.
Conflict
• Conflict is natural: every relationship that
has existed for a certain period of time has
experienced conflict.
• Most conflicts result from one party
believing they have something to lose.
• No matter how good a relationship, there
are times when an individual’s ideas,
needs or goals will not match
those of others around
him or her.
Conflict
Conflict is a fact of life – and so are the
feelings that accompany it. For example,
hurt, anger, frustration, resentment and
disappointment are some emotional
sources.
Sources of Conflict
1. Misunderstandings
2. Communication Barriers
3. Conflicts of Interest
4. Dependency
5. Need for Consensus
What is your conflict style?
• Avoider
• Accommodator
• Competitor
• Compromiser
• Collaborator
The Avoider
The Avoider
Do you have the tendency to deny,
suppress, or “put aside” differences?
• Born out of the desire to preserve
harmony and prevent upsetting, negative
interactions.
• If resentments grow, the individual will
either gradually withdraw or
explode resulting in the
opposite of harmony.
The Avoider
• Learn to speak up respectfully about those
things that bother you or about issues
which can potentially affect the team’s
ability to accomplish its goals.
• Begin with an “empathy statement” –
letting the other person know you
understand or want to understand how
he/she sees and feels about
the situation then proceed to
tackle the real issue.
The Accommodator
The Accommodator
Do you yield or subordinate your concerns
to those of the other person?
• This style can grow out of the desire to
avoid conflict, or it can be due to the
person’s belief that his or her rights,
feelings, or desires are not as important as
those of others.
The Accommodator
• It is admirable to care for others. However,
that concern must be accompanied by a
corresponding respect for one’s own
rights, opinions and boundaries.
• The key principle for the accommodator to
learn is balance. It is balance that will
assist the accommodator to
function without burning out.
The Competitor
The Competitor
Do you see each workplace conflict as an
opportunity to “win”? Do you go all out to
win, often at the expense of others?
• This competitiveness can take the form of
either overt aggression (rudeness, loud
voice, angry facial expressions) or more
“passive or covert aggression
(gossip, back-stabbing, etc.)
The Competitor
• Look at the long-term results of falling into
the trap of power struggles that never
quite end. The truth is, “winning” is short-
lived.
• Even when you succeed at putting
someone else down, the person will
typically look for and find ways to even the
score.
The Competitor
• Recognize that storing anger and looking for
ways to “pay back” keeps you tied to the
negative situation and robs you of energy and
effectiveness.
• Learn to confront issues directly, resolve them,
and then refuse to hold grudges.
• The only way to truly “win” is for everyone
involved to leave the table feeling like winners,
with each person’s concerns having
been heard and his/her basic
needs having being met.
Compromiser
Compromiser
Compromise is typically perceived as a
positive step in conflict resolution.
However, this is not the best style as
opposing sides are left with the task of
“settling for half a loaf.”
Compromiser
• While the “splitting the difference” strategy
has good intentions, it is more effective to
become a collaborator.
• Collaboration requires more time, more
commitment, and more creativity – but is
doable with practice.
Collaborator
Collaborator
• When you collaborate, you work with the
other person to mutually solve the problem
in a way that recognizes and honors the
goals of each.
• Be honest and direct, while being
considerate.
Collaborator
• Avoid emotionally charged words and name-
calling.
• Stick to the topic at hand, citing recent
examples.
• Share responsibility for the solution.
• Describe the problem in objective terms.
• Actively listen for what the other person values,
and work to help that person achieve those
things as diligently as you try
to get your own needs met.
Collaborator
Adding collaboration to your repertoire of
team skills will significantly enhance your
effectiveness as a team leader or member.
Conflict Resolution
Conflict Resolution
1. Identify the cause/causes of the conflict
2. Obtain clarification
3. Develop ideas
4. Discuss possible solutions
5. Agree on specific action steps
6. Evaluate and refine the plan
Conflict Escalators
Conflict Escalators
• Lack of understanding
• Passivity
• Aggressiveness
• Personality focus
• Negativity
• Tunnel vision
Lack of Understanding
A vast number of conflicts are the result of
simple misunderstanding – people just
didn’t listen to each other.
What we generally call “listening” is only
impatiently waiting until it’s our turn to talk.
It’s a common trait, but one that increases
the potential for misunderstanding
and conflict.
Passivity
Many of us have difficulty saying exactly
what we want. Perhaps we think that it’s
rude to ask for something outright, or we
are unclear about our own goals.
Sometimes we fall into passivity because
we think that others should be able to tell
us what we want. When we hope people
will guess what
we want, we’re not likely to
get it.
Aggressiveness
Instead of hinting, we order people
around, often in a demanding, threatening
way. We may do this out of mistaken
notions about leadership, or we may be
hiding our insecurity.
Whatever the cause, when we act
aggressively, people usually feel angry
and resentful.
It turns them off and drives
them away.
Personality Focus
Conflict is often attributed to the
characteristics or behavior of people rather
than to disagreement about an issue.