DEVELOPING AND

MAINTAINING
RELATIONSHIP

PREPARED BY: ALVILYN S. GONZALES

OBJECTIVES:

• A. TO DISCUSS AN UNDERSTANDING OF TEEN AGE RELATIONSHIPS,

INCLUDING THE ACCEPTABLE AND UNACCEPTABLE EXPRESSIONS OF
ATTRACTIONS
• B. EXPRESS YOUR WAYS OF SHOWING ATTRACTION, LOVE, AND
COMMITMENT;
• C. IDENTIFY WAYS TO BECOME RESPONSIBLE IN A RELATIONSHIP
PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

• The type of relationship which is closely

associated with a person and which can only
have meaning to this person.
INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• The interconnections and interdependence

between two individuals
 INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• The exchange of verbal and nonverbal messages between two

people who have a relationship and are influenced by their
partner’s messages

• 
INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• A web of relationships that connect individuals to

one another Relational Network
TYPES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• FAMILY:
• Small social group bound by ties of blood, civil contract, and
a commitment to care for one another Types of
Interpersonal Relationships
TYPES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• FRIENDSHIP
• Close and caring relationship between two people
• Perceived as mutually satisfying and beneficial
 TYPES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

• ROMANTIC Relationships
• Love “deep affection for and attachment to another person”
• Intimacy “Closeness and understanding of a relational
partner”
8 TYPES OF LOVE
TYPES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

ONLINE Relationships
• Virtual relationships
• Hyperpersonal communication
THREE STAGES OF FALLING IN LOVE
BY HELEN FISHER
1. Lust – is driven by the sex hormones,
testosterone, and estrogen.
2. Attraction – lovestruck phase, which
involves neurotransmitters in the brain such
as dopamine, norepinephrine, and
serotonin.
3. Attachment – long-lasting commitments are
exchanged, and may lead to raising a
family. Oxytocin believes to promote
intimacy; vasopressin which promotes
long_x0002_term relationships
ATTACHMENTS: The Attachment Theory_ How Childhood Affects Life.mp4

• 1. SECURE ATTACHMENT- when the

primary caregiver is most of the time
present and available and when all the
emotional needs of an infant are met,
will grow up
providing a sense of a security to the with a more
infant. secure and
stable
relationship
ATTACHMENT

• 2. ANXIOUS AVOIDANT
ATTACHMENT- when the primary
caregiver is cold and detached, and even
unresponsive to a child's needs.

• The posibility of isolation is real for

people who have
• this type of attachment.
ATTACHMENTS

• 3. ANXIOUS-AMBIVALENT
ATTRACTION- when the primary
caregiver is not consistent in terms of
presence and in meeting a child's
emotional needs.
separation anxiety, mixed
feelings beween
hesitancy and
• 4. ANXIOUS DISORGANIZED commitment when
entering into
meaningful relationships.
WHY WILL YOU SAY NO TO SEX

• PRONE TO STD
• POSSIBILITY OF PREGNANCY
• RIGHT TIME FOR SEX
• BOUNDARY/LIMIT
HOW TO AVOID PEER/DATE PRESSURE

• HANG OUT WITH FRIENDS WHO BELIEVED ON LIMITS

• GO OUT IN GROUP
• INTRODUCE YOUR FRIENDS TO YOUR PARENTS
• INVITE YOUR FRIENDS TO YOUR HOME
• STICK UP FOR YOUR FRIENDS IF THEY ARE BEING PRESSURED
HOW TO AVOID PEER/DATE PRESSURE

• SAY NO IT IN ADVANCE
• ALWAYS CARRY WITH YOU MONEY OR CELLPHONE IF YOU WANT TO LEAVE
THE PLACE
• NEVER OBLIGE TO PAY BACK IN RETURN FOR GIFTS OR A DATE
•PART 11
THE ROZENBERG QUARTERLY SEVERAL
THEORIES
RELATED TO ATTRACTION AND LIKING:
• 1. Transference Effect- Our past relationships can therefore affect our current interactions
with people.
• 2. Propinquity Effect- Proximity promotes familiarity and hence, liking, this can also be
true if we do not like a person.
• 3. Similarity- is a strong factor in friendship and in the selection of a mate because it
promotes intimacy, trust, empathy, and long-lasting relationships
• 4. Reciprocity - The more we are liked by someone we equally like, the more we
behave in ways that promote mutual feelings of liking.
• 5. Physical attractiveness- Physical attractiveness connotes positive health and
reproductive fitness, which are both essential to human survival.
• 6. Personality Characteristics and Traits-
• Empathic persons and socially competent persons.
• Happy and cheerful disposition, poised, and can present themselves well, outgoing, ad sexually warm
and responsive
• Integrity, income potential, and stability of men
• Attractiveness and Vitality of women
WHY DO WE FORM RELATIONSHIPS

• COMPANIONSHIP
• STIMULATION
• ACHIEVING GOAL
• PROXIMITY
• PHYSICAL ATTRACTION
• SIMILARITY
LOVING: OTHER BASES

• Unconscious assessment of another person’s genes through their physical appearance

• Genes are usually determinants of good health
• Both male and female are often attracted to symmetry
• Pheromones – an odorless chemical found in urine and sweat can be detected by the nose, are
• involved in the assessment of a future mate, an indication of a person’s immune system.
-Women are also attracted to men who smell similar to their father.
• Preference of individuals to marry somebody who resembles one or both of their parents.
WHY IS PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP IMPORTANT

• LIVE LONGER
• DEAL WITH STRESS
• BE HEALTHIER: DEPRESSION, DECREASED IMMUNE FUCNTION, HIGH BLOOD
PRESSURE

• FEEL RICHER
COSTS MANAGING RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS

•  Costs and rewards

• Social exchange of costs and benefits
• Rewards Extrinsic (e.g. social status)
• Instrumental (e.g. saving on rent)
• Intrinsic (e.g. feeling of safety)
STAGES OF A RELATIONSHIP 
COMMON RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

CHEATING
SEXUAL ISSUES
SIGNIFICANT DIFFERENCES
LIFE STAGES
TRAUMATIC EVENTS
STRESS (PHYSICAL/EMOTIONAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL/FINANCIAL)
BOREDOM
COMMON RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

JEALOUSY
BLENDED FAMILY ISSUES
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE (VERBAL/PHYSICAL ABUSE)
IRRESPONSIBILITY
UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS
ADDICTIONS
LACK OF SUPPORT
COMMON RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

DOMINANCY
COMMUNICATION
GIVE AND TAKE
DEPRESSION
•PART 111
VARIABLES RELATED TO STRENGTHENING
COMMITMENT
• 1. Accumulation of all rewards of the relationship support from the partner; sexual
satisfactions; emotional, financial, and physical security; adventure; and novelty
• 2. Temptation of alternative partners the presence of possible alternatives for another
partner can rock the relationship and destabilize the commitment of a couple.
• 3. Investments made by the couple in the relationship may include time spent together,
common beliefs and experiences, mutual experiences with mutual friends, and bearing
children. Religious beliefs reinforce commitment
NURTURE YOU RELATIONSHIP

• CONNECT WITH YOUR FAMILY

• PRACTICE GRATITUDE
• LEARN TO FORGIVE
• BE COMPASSIONATE
• ACCEPTANCE
• CREATE RITUALS TOGETHER
• SPEND RIGHT TIME WITH THEM
RULES FOR FINDING LOVE AND CREATING
LONG LASTING AUTHENTIC RELATIONSHIPS
• LOVE YOURSELF FIRST
• PARTNERING IS A CHOICE TO NURTURE
• CREATING LOVE AS A PROCESS
• PROVIDE TO OPPORTUNITY TO GROW
• COMMUNICATION
• NEGOTIATION
RULES FOR FINDING LOVE AND CREATING
LONG LASTING AUTHENTIC RELATIONSHIPS

• IT WILL BE A CHALLENGE BY CHANGE

• RENEWAL IS THE KEY FOR LONGEVITY
SPOILERS TO COMMITMENT

• 1. Criticism -there is the absence of unconditional positive regard for each other in a
relationship
• 2. Denial of the existence of conflict. When one party eludes the presence of a problem
and refuses to discuss it, as if belittling the problem, it will result in frustration on the side
of the other party
• 3. Contempt- Someone who looks down on the party as inferior does not give
unconditional positive regard, and aggravates the situation by expressing superiority over
the other.
• “ultimate expression of disillusionment and highly predictive of “divorce” or separation.
HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

• PARTNERS ARE
• TREATED WITH KINDLESS AND RESPECT
• HONESTY
• LIKE TO SPEND TIME TOGETHER
• TAKE INTEREST IN THINGS AND ARE IMPORTANCE TO EACH OTHER
RESPONSIBILITIES IN A RELATIONSHIP

• 1.Be responsible for what you think and say to the other person.
• 2.Be responsible for what you promise to do or not to do.
• 3. Ensure the relationship is mutually beneficial.
• 4.Respect the other party or parties involved.
• 5.Be ready to provide support when needed.
BASIC RIGHT IN ARELATIONSHIP

PATIENCE
HONESTY
KINDNESS
RESPECT