议论文核心段的扩展

CC 从 5 到 7 的飞跃
新浪微博： @ 杜仕明 - 学为贵
23/7/12

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 核心段的扩展

一篇议论文包括一个介绍段， 2-3 个核心段和一个总结段。一般来说，考官最看重

的是核心段质量，因为从字数和内容来说都占到了一篇议论文的绝大部分。因此，

在学习任何一种具体议论文题型之前我们应该了解如何顺畅地扩展核心段。从一个

topic sentence 到一个完整核心段的过程有很多方法，此课件的任务和目的就是教会

大家如何连贯流畅地把一个 topic sentence 往下降，最终形成闭环的论证逻辑。

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 Topic sentence 的基本原则

1. 与题目紧密相关，不能随心所欲，一般来自原题或者个人观点。

2. 在往下细化的时候， TS 必须是一个自己有把握能扩展的方向，否则写不动；

3. 大部分情况下 Topic sentence 会是一个明确的结果或者明确的建议，偶尔可以用一

个事实或者趋势来作为 TS ，但主要用在分析原因来的题目中。

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 扩展 TS 的方法有很多，我们来从简单到复杂地学习。

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三种核心段的目的和扩展方式：

1. 论证一个好处或者坏处
明确的影响 / 结果作为 TS  原因分析  举例 / 对比 / 反向假设 扣回 TS （改写
重复或者往下降一层）

 
2. 一个段落多分论点的展开（一般出现在 discussion 或者 outweigh ）
带着信号词（ some/several/two/three ）的笼统型 TS  Firstly, 第一个分论点 + 解
释  Secondly, 第二个分论点 + 解释

 
3. 分析一个原因（几乎只出现在 report ）
用事实 / 趋势作为原因 TS  结果 / 举例  结果 ( 回应题目主题 )

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•明确的影响作为 TS  原因分析  举例 / 对比 / 反向假设 
扣回 TS （改写重复或者往下降一层）

1.解释原因是人类的本能，但必要要保证 TS 是一个结果；
2.原因解释写完之后有很多方法继续往下扩展，不要局限；

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 TS + 原因解释 + 对比 -- 早上学对孩子的好处

Another advantage of going to school at an early age is that children

develop faster socially. ( 针对前面 socially 的解释，省略了 This is

because)They make friends and learn how to get on with other children of a

similar age. ( 没有举例，但是用上学和在家待着作为对比 )This is often

not possible at home because they are the only child, or because their

brothers or sisters are older or younger.

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 TS + 原因解释 + 举例解释 --- 互联网的使用导致隐私威胁

On the other hand, using the internet does have a potential cost with regard to loss of privacy. (This is

because) everything that internet users do is recorded by companies such as Google and Facebook,

and there is not much that the typical user can do to prevent it. For example, internet users should bear

in mind that all of their emails and searches are saved, and that Google might know more about their

activities than their families do. As far as Facebook is concerned, its users seem happy to reveal the

identities of their friends and families, as well as their daily activities, even though this private

information is stored definitely. If it fell into the wrong hands, it could represent a real threat to

people's freedom, security, and money.

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 TS + 原因解释 + 举例解释 + 另一个原因 -- 鼓励学生给老师评分

Encouraging students to criticize or grade their teachers contributes to improving teaching quality.

This is partly because complaints from the former help the latter to become aware of the defects in

their teaching methods. For example, if a large proportion of students complain about the

difficulty of math classes, the teacher will improve the situation by making more explanation or

slowing down the pace of learning. Apart from that, as important decisions including merit

reviews, pay raises, and promotions are based in part on these evaluations, teachers must treat

feedback carefully and do everything possible to make improvements in their teaching, such as

spending more time correcting homework. – 这个片段里有两次原因解释

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 自己练习

不可否认不同年纪的人有不同的购物习惯。（这是因为）随着年纪增

长，人们的需求和兴趣在不断变化。比如说，小孩子把零花钱全花在

零食和玩具上，而年轻人则开始追逐时尚，购买潮流的鞋子和衣服。

中年人的钱主要被用来改善生活质量比如更大的房子和更好的汽车，

而老年人则只愿意花钱在健康相关的产品上。

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 自己练习（先自己扩展中文，再翻译成英文）

在家工作效率低 – 因为有分心和干扰 – 比如说宠物或者小孩子

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 有的时候在一个核心段需要给出两个及以上的分论点。
这时候 TS 给人的感觉是至少包括两个分论点。
- 这种情况一般出现在 Discuss 或者 outweigh 这类题型中

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 支持校服的理由

People in favour of students wearing school uniforms believe that it has a number of benefits.

1). Firstly, requiring students to wear uniforms helps reduce peer pressure. When everyone in

the class is dressed in the same way, they are not likely to talk about the price and taste of

clothes. As a result, no one would feel a sense of superiority or prejudiced. 2). In addition, the

rule of wearing school uniforms keeps the campus safe. This is because those who are not

members of the school can be easily recognized and kept outside. There are consequently

fewer possibilities of some incidents, such as theft or gang bullying on campus.

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 联系外星人的好处

On the one hand, from the perspective of some optimists, there may be great benefits to contacting

alien life forms. 1). It is likely that our neighbours in space would lend us their far more advanced

technologies to solve a series of problems on the Earth. For example, environmental pollution

could be eradicated and life-threatening diseases could be cured if we could be technologically

improved by our alien friends. 2). What is more, with their assistance, human beings may be able

to make a significant step forward to live on other planets. This means that we would no longer be

afraid of facing any catastrophe that might destroy our home planet.

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On the one hand, there are two reasons why some people say we are more dependent on each

other now. 1). Firstly, the cost of living has increased so dramatically that life is more complex

and difficult. Young adults, for example, have to rely on their parents for financial help when

renting a flat or buying a house. Housing prices are higher than ever, and if relying on themselves

it would be impossible for many young people to pay a deposit and a mortgage. 2). Secondly,

people want a better quality of life for their families. This means that both parents usually need to

work full-time, and they depend on support from grandparents and babysitters for child care.

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 自己练习

住在楼房高层的人们享受一些好处。首先，他们有更好的视野景

观。比如说，他们可以看到城市的全貌以及城市外面的自然风

景。其次，高层住户享受更好的生活环境，因为家里会有更好的

光线和通风，这对保持房间卫生有很大帮助。

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 举办奥运会的好处（ TS 有预告的效果）

Holding the Olympic Games allows the host country to reap benefits in terms of economic growth

and public health. With regard to the former, millions of people are attracted to the host county to

watch world-class sports games and to experience the local culture, both of which bring in billions of

dollars in cash and create a large number of job opportunities. The other contribution made by hosting

this international event is that an interest in sports will be developed in the public as the government

builds more sports facilities and introduces knowledge of various sports. As a result, they would

become more physically active and the level of health in the general population could be improved.

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 自己练习

在家工作让人们可以灵活安排时间和享受舒适的环境。 With regard to

the former, 在家工作的人可以按照自己的情况来决定工作和休息。比如

说，……… The other benefit is that 人们可以很舒服地在家工作。比

如说，没有必要穿正装或者 high heels ，可以选择最舒服的衣服。

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 针对题目给出的现象来分析原因

（最可能出现在 report 题型里分析原因）

TS( 用事实 / 趋势作为原因 ) + 进一步的结果 + 进一步的结果

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 TS + 进一步结果 + 进一步结果 —孩子在学校表现糟糕的原因

In many countries, the birth rate is decreasing so that families are smaller with fewer children.

These children are often spoilt because they are allowed to have whatever they want, regardless

of price, and to behave as they please. This means that the children grow up without

consideration for others. When they get to school age they have not learnt any self control or

discipline. They have less respect for their teachers and refuse to obey school rules in the way

that their parents did.

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 TS + 进一步结果 + 举例 —为什么青少年犯罪数量增加

Today, with the rising cost of living, both parents have to work full time to provide a high

quality of life. This means that less time is spent with their children and less attention is

paid to guiding their behaviour. If minor mistakes are not spotted and corrected in the first

time, then they are very likely to escalate into more serious wrongdoings. For example,

children who steal money from parents without being caught may try to shoplift in the local

Sainsbury or Tesco.

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 自己练习（为什么每天很多事物被浪费）

超市和商店经常有促销活动 -- > 这会刺激顾客冲动消费，为了

更便宜的价格 --> 这导致他们买超过自己真实需求的食物 -- >

其中一部分没有被吃掉就坏了，只能当做垃圾浪费掉

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