GOOD

MANNERS
 Why Good Manners are Good for You
GUIDE TO GOOD MANNERS
- Good manners put people at ease
-GOOD MANNERS ALLOW PEOPLE TO LIVE
AND WORK TOGETHER WITHOUT
UNNECESSARY FRICTION – THIS MAKES OUR - Good manners impress people – people who are impressed by
EVERYDAY WORLD MORE PLEASANT

your behavior are more likely to treat you with respect

- Good manners build self-esteem – teenagers with self-esteem

are more likely to achieve what they want in life

- Good manners are attractive – you will attract the right type of
friends and relationships

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Good manners are rare – young people who have them
sparkle like diamonds and immediately have an elevated
status in the eyes of adults

-Good manners make you feel good – with good manners

you can hold your head high

Good manners make others feel good – you help create a

world where people treat one another with care, respect,
and compassion.

Good manners don’t cost anything – you can have the best
for FREE

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 WHAT EXACTLY ARE GOOD MANNERS?
MANNERS ARE THE CUSTOMS AND TRADITIONS OF A
SOCIETY THAT GOVERN HOW PEOPLE TREAT ONE
ANOTHER AND BEHAVE IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS.
MANNERS MAINTAIN ORDER, PROMOTE SOCIETAL
VALUES AND FOSTER POSITIVE HUMAN INTERACTION.
IMAGINE THE CHAOS AND HURT WE WOULD
EXPERIENCE IF EVERYBODY DID WHATEVER THEY
WANTED, WHENEVER THEY WANTED, WITHOUT ANY
REGARD FOR THE FEELINGS OR INTERESTS OF OTHERS.

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 GOOD Etiquette – the sets of rules that give
expression the manners – can vary from

MANNERS culture to culture.

In some cultures, you should remove
your shoes before entering someone’s
house, etc.
It is important to know the manners of
the culture in which you are operating.

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 GOOD
MANNERS TO
PRACTICE:

Say “Please”, Respect Clean up after

“Thank you”, adults yourself
“You’re welcome”,
“Excuse me”

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 • Don’t interrupt. Wait for your turn
to speak

• Treat people as you would like to

be treated – Golden Rule

• Use good table manners

• Have compassion toward others

• Be thoughtful about opening
doors and offering your seat
• Respond when spoken to
 Listen when others speak
 Don’t say hurtful things
 Think before you speak
 Respect the property of the
community.

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What is Etiquette
Etiquette is a set of specific rules designed to ensure polite behavior in a
group or within a culture.
• When someone knows and follows the expected rules for behavior, we
say that person has good etiquette or good manners.
Part of being properly socialized within a culture is learning what that
culture considers acceptable behavior in dining, conversation, and attire.
Proper etiquette can vary from culture to culture, so it is important for
foreigners, missionaries, and anyone hoping to reach across cultural lines
to study the manners of that culture.
The Bible gives some solid guidelines about practicing etiquette and
developing good manners.

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• The basic standard for Christian behavior is 1 Cor 10:31, which says,
“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the
glory of God.”
• When our goal is to honor the Lord in every way, we remain aware
that we represent Him everywhere we go.
• Whether sitting in the chapel, dining, classroom, or working at our
duties we can do so for the glory of God.
• When we carry the reputation of Jesus with us, our behavior affects
the way others see Him.
• For one of God’s servants to be perceived as rude and uncivilized
would be dishonoring to the Lord. Good etiquette is one way we can
remove social barriers and create a connection with people who need
to hear the gospel.

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 Paul traveled across many cultures in sharing the gospel
and planting churches. He wrote that “I have become all
things to all men, so that I may, by all means, save
some” 1 Cor 9:22.
 The idiom “When in Rome, do as the Romans do”
summarizes that thought.
 Slurping soup in one culture is thought rude, while in
another it shows appreciation to the cook.
 Handshake etiquette varies from culture to culture as
well.
 Firm grips in America may translate as aggression to a
Middle Easterner who is accustomed to hugs and kisses
on the cheek.
 Our goal as Christians is to give the least amount of
personal offense by the way we behave within a culture
while paving the way for the sharing of God’s truth.

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 Speech is another way we can either show
proper etiquette or bring offense. Eph
4:29 relates God’s expectation for spoken
communication: “Let no unwholesome word
proceed from your mouth, but only such a
word as is good for edification according to the
need of the moment so that it will give grace to
those who hear.”
 That standard harmonizes with the injunction
that there be no “filthiness nor foolish talk nor
crude joking, which are out of place” Eph 5:4).
 We can offend by our words as easily as we
can offend by our actions, so learning
culturally appropriate verbal skills is a part of
having good etiquette.

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• As believers in Jesus Christ, we have been entrusted
with the message of reconciliation 2 Cor 5:19 and we
should deliver that message graciously, with good
manners: “Always be prepared to give an answer to
everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope
that you have.
• But do this with gentleness and respect” I pet 3:15).
• There is no excuse for a Christian who is knowingly
rude to others, especially during his presentation of the
gospel.
• Bad manners and poor etiquette are distractions to the
message we bear

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 Etiquette is more than fussy rules laid down by
stuffy people; etiquette is the oil that lubricates
society and reduces the friction of interpersonal
relationships.
 When we view etiquette as a means by which we
earn the right to speak into people’s lives, we
become more sensitive to the way we present
ourselves.
 We see our behaviors, from table manners to
telling jokes, as instruments that either attract or
distance others.
 Jesus is our model. He came to earth and took on
our dress, customs, and manners in order to lead
us to God Phil 2:5-8. As His followers, we should
see etiquette as a way to follow in His footsteps.

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 VIRTUES
Virtues are the essence of our
character and character does
indeed determine destiny.
The more we recognize the
potential impact that practicing
virtues can have on
our lives, the more our lives open
up to new possibilities and to
greater joy and fulfillment.

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 What are Virtues?

Virtues are the essence of our

character and when we keep
the practice of virtues at the
heart of everyday life, we live
with purpose.

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  Virtue, by definition, is the moral excellence of a person.
 Morally excellent people have a character made-up of virtues valued as
good.
 They are honest, respectful, courageous, forgiving, and kind, for example.
 They do the right thing and don’t bend to impulses, urges, or desires, but
act according to values and principles.
 Some might say good qualities are innate, but we are not perfect.
 Virtues need to be cultivated to become more prevalent in life.
 With the habit of being virtuous, we take the helm of our own life,
redirecting its course towards greater happiness and fulfillment.

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Why Practice Virtues?
• Virtues are universal and recognized by all cultures as basic
qualities of well-being.
When we practice virtues and build our “character muscle,” we
attract what may have been missing in our life such as fulfilling
relationships and achievement of meaningful goals. But it’s not easy.
So often we know that it takes perseverance to reach our goals, and
we still never get there.
We know if we forgive, we will be less angry and resentful.
We know it takes courage to accomplish great things. So why then,
if we know what to do, are we still stuck?
Because we have not yet consciously and boldly applied a virtue to
a given situation so as to alter its outcome such as in these
examples:
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• Discipline enables a person to achieve the goal of running a 25-mile race, creating better
health.
• Kindness towards someone who is having a bad day can make him or her smile and build
rapport.
• Creativity can result in an idea that changes how people relate to one another such as social
media.
• Trust in a relationship fosters dependability and intimacy, creating valuable, meaningful
relationships.
• Gratitude in a job loss can shift our focus from feeling low to how we can have a new, more
fulfilling career.
• Service to others can change lives, better neighborhoods, and create stronger nations.

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Becoming More Virtuous People
We know we are becoming more virtuous people, not only because of the
results above but also because of the way other people respond to us. Our
friends, families, co-workers, and neighbors will trust and rely on us.
They will come to us for guidance and help. They will want to be around us
because we inspire them to be better people.
People will know us as someone with an exceptional character who makes the
right choices and strives for excellence in all we do.
Can life be lived any better?
Practicing virtues allows us to develop our potential, and live a more
purposeful, better life; a life not ordinary but extraordinary.

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 .

Assertiveness
Disposed to or characterized by bold or confident statements and behavior
Complements: Confidence, Courage
Transcends: Self-doubt, Shyness
Cleanliness
The practice of keeping yourself and your surroundings clean
Complements: Orderliness, Purity
Transcends: Dirtiness

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Compassion
Sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it
Complements: Caring, Understanding
Transcends: Grief, Judgment

Confidence
A feeling or belief that you can do something well or succeed at something
Complements: Assertiveness, Courage
Transcends: Self-doubt, Uncertainty

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 Courage
Mental or moral strength to venture, persevere and
withstand danger, fear, or difficulty
Complements: Boldness, Confidence
Transcends: Fear, Self-doubt

• Detachment
• Lack of emotion or personal interest
• Complements: Faith, Freedom
• Transcends: Control

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Encouragement
Something that makes someone more
determined, hopeful, or confident
Complements: Support, Caring
Transcends: Self-doubt, Discouragement

• Forgiveness
• The act of forgiving someone or something
• Complements: Freedom, Peace
• Transcends: Anger, Bitterness

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 Generosity
The quality of being kind,
understanding, and not selfish; the
quality of being generous
Complements: Kindness, Service
Transcends: Stinginess, Self-centered

• Gentleness
• Having or showing a kind and quiet
nature; not harsh or violent
• Complements: Patience, Peace
• Transcends: Aggression

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Gratitude
A feeling of appreciation or thanks
Complements: Hope, Joy, Peace
Transcends: Disappointment, Pain

• Honesty
• The quality of being fair and truthful
• Complements: Integrity, Truthfulness
• Transcends: Deceitfulness

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Humility
The quality or state of not thinking you are better
than other people
Complements: Modesty
Transcends: Arrogance, Pride
• Kindness
• The quality or state of being kind; a kind
act
• Complements: Caring, Compassionate
• Transcends: Cruelty, Loneliness

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 Modesty
The quality of not being too proud or confident
about yourself or your abilities
Complements: Humility
Transcends: Self-importance

• Orderliness
• Arranged or organized in a logical or regular
way
• Complements: Cleanliness, Purity
• Transcends: Chaos

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Patience
The ability to wait for a long time
without becoming annoyed or upset
Complements: Determination, Peace
Transcends: Frustration

• Perseverance
• Continued effort to do or achieve something
despite difficulties, failure, or opposition
• Complements: Commitment, Determination,
Resilience
• Transcends: Laziness

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 Respect
An act of giving particular attention
Complements: Dignity, Reverence
Transcends: Inconsideration
• Self-discipline
• correction or regulation of oneself for
the sake of improvement
• Complements: Commitment,
Determination
• Transcends: Chaos, Unruliness

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Temperate
Habitual moderation in the indulgence
of the appetites or passions
Complements: Moderation
Transcends: Excessive

• Thankfulness
• Conscious of benefits received
• Complements: Gratitude, Thoughtfulness
• Transcends: Unappreciative

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Understanding
An agreement of opinion or feeling;
adjustment of differences
Complements: Kindness, Tolerance
Transcends: Egoism
• Truthfulness
• Telling or disposed to tell the truth
• Complements: Honesty, Faith, Trust
• Transcends: Corruption, Deceit

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 THANKS, END OF
THE
PRESENTATION
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