Listening

• Listening is the conscious processing of the auditory stimuli that have

been perceived through hearing.
• Listening differs from obeying. Parents may commonly conflate the
two, by telling a disobedient child that he "didn't listen to me".
However, a person who receives and understands information or an
instruction, and then chooses not to comply with it or to agree to it,
has listened to the speaker, even though the result is not what the
speaker wanted.
Essentials of Good listening and tips
• Attention
• Body language
• Eye contact
• Reassure the speaker
• Do not interrupt
• Analyze the tone
• Effective use of silence
• Clarification
Attention
Attention may be defined as the visual portion of concentration on the
speaker. Through eye contact and other body language, we
communicate to the speaker that we are paying close attention to his/her
messages.
All the time we are reading the verbal and nonverbal cues from the
speaker, the speaker is reading ours. What messages are we sending out?
If we lean forward a little and focus our eyes on the person, the message
is we are paying close attention.
 Body language
• A lot of communication is non-verbal. Therefore, one need to pay
attention to the body language and that of the speaker while
engaging in a conversation. Avoid fidgeting with things and hands,
tapping foot or rearranging papers on desk, as these actions indicate
the disinterest in the conversation. One need to use their eyes and
ears in tandem and maintain eye contact while listening. An
occasional nod of the head will indicate the acceptance and interest.
Eye contact
• Eye contact is important when listening. If listener give the speaker
the impression of not being interested and are distracted, they may
never open up again. When someone is talking , focusing directly on
their eyes so that they will know with certainty of absorbing every
single word.Even if the topic is not interesting , respecting and truly
listening to what the speaker has to say.
Reassure the speaker
• Communicating and letting the conclusion of the conversation,
known to the speaker is a good practice. Making it clear that
listener is open to further discussion .In addition, reassuring the
speaker of the intention to keep the discussion confidential.
Do not interrupt
• Not interrupting the speaker with what they feel or think about the
"telling". Instead, wait for the other person to ask the opinion before
breaking the flow of their discourse. Active listening requires the
listener to shelve his or her own opinions temporarily and patiently
await appropriate breaks in conversation. When the conversation
breaks, provide a summary or an empathetic concurrence.If listener
interrupt the person too soon, then the speaker will be frustrated and
won't fully absorb what listener is saying. This will cause
miscommunication and distraction .
Analyze the tone
• Volume and tone both add to what someone is saying.A good speaker
will use both volume and tone to their advantage to keep an audience
attentive; everybody will use pitch, tone and volume of voice in
certain situations – let these help listener to understand the emphasis
of what is being said.
Effective Use of silence
• For effective active or empathic listening use silence appropriately. Allow
for comfortable silences to slow down the exchange. Give the person time
to think as well as talk.Silence can also be very helpful in diffusing an
unproductive interaction.
Clarification
• The process of bringing vague material into sharper focus.To
untangle unclear or wrong listener interpretation.To get more
information.To help the speaker see other points of view. To
identify what was said.