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What Is Gaslighting in the Workplace?

• Gaslighting at work is when a person—typically a colleague or manager

—invalidates what you know to be true, forcing you to question the
facts and, ultimately, yourself and your ability to do your job
• “Some People try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others”

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 Identify a Gaslighter:3 Questions?

1.Is this person trying to dominate and control situations

and conversations?
2.Is what they’re saying actually not true?
3. Is the gas lighter breaking Workplace/Societal norms and
rules by shaming, humiliating and essentially bullying you?
• “A lot of times, gaslighting in the office is done by
someone who’s more senior than you or someone
who is well-liked, so it can be more challenging for
you to identify the behavior and stop it given their
authority/seniority,” 4
 10 Common Examples of Gaslighting by a Boss or Colleague at Work:

• Defensive and challenges your perspective, lashing out when you bring up an issue that matters to you
• Says they never got the presentation you definitely turned in on time.
• Peppers in positive reinforcement, but only when you’re nearing your breaking point
• Makes a racist or sexist comment only to condemn it when other colleagues do the same thing
• Downplays any mention of race
• Borrows and replaces items on your desk without asking
• Swears they’re taking action on something—when they’re doing nothing of the sort
• Says it’s fine to skip that a.m. meeting
• Collects information from you on repeat, but you eventually learn that they are only selectively listening
• Changes company policies to suit their own objectives

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 Here’s How to Put an End to Gaslighting Work

• Document everything. Keep a diary, write down what was said or if it’s over an email, create a folder in a
non-work account. Also, recap conversations that were had with the gas lighter in writing by including bullets
of what was discussed.
• Be direct. You can try to address the situations directly with the gaslighter—and again, document what was
said after the fact—but be prepared that they may deny everything and seem more defiant and belligerent.
• Talk to a colleague you can trust. If it feels safe, bring up what’s been happening and ask if they’ve been
harassed in this way as well. That way, when you approach HR, you can potentially enlist the group to be a
united front.
• Bring documentation to any meeting with your boss or HR. That folder you’ve been keeping? You want to
have it on hand, whether your meeting is with colleagues or on your own. Talk about the toxic gaslight
behavior with examples. Companies typically outline ways to address harassment—gaslighting definitely
counts as one—so you can also refer to company guidelines for next steps. There may even be an
anonymous company hotline you could use to report this.

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 What Leaders Can Do?
• Believe employees when they share what’s happening
• Be on the lookout for signs of gas lighting
• Intervene in the moments that matter
• Isolate the manager who is gas lighting
• Assisting employees to finding a new opportunity

• Source : Mita Mallick in her HBR Article

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