Solution Focused Mentoring

What’s the problem?

Most people are “trained” in asking diagnostic questions (Why, what,

when, where, who and how).
However if one kept dwelling on “why did you do it”, “who else”, “Why
didn’t you think beforehand”, it may end up becoming a blame game and
deters people from moving on.
Understanding the problem is important but it
may not point you to the solution.

In fact by asking too many problem-focused

diagnostic questions may lead people to be
• Defensive
• Uptight
• Close up
• Discouraged
Solution focused mentoring emphasies on
empowering others or self to:

• How the preferred future looks like for you

• Choice of words that create possibilities
• Taking small & do-able steps towards the goal
(Vs overwhelming details)
• Develops motivation and positivity
• Focus on what has worked well for you
• Repeating past successes, rather than dwelling
on past failures
Solution focus mentoring focuses on desired
outcome with the attitude of moving forward.

It should be authentic.
Solution focus conversations can be applied in
• Counselling
• Mentoring
• Facilitating constructive feedback
• A lifestyle
Solution focus outline
• The desired situation question
• The what’s better question.
• The coping question.
• The past success question.
• Paraphrasing using the receivers words
• The scaling question.
• The miracle question.
• The exception seeking question.
• The usefulness question.
• Solution focused directing.
Questions to create progression
Focus on helping them find the solution for themselves

• "What could you do to to improve the situation?”

Vs

• Rather than "I think you should stop what you are doing and
start………. "
In short,
solution focused conversation is focusing on
what you want (a desired outcome)
Not on what you do not want
1. The desired situation question.
These are questions that help clarify what the desired outcome of a situation is.

Clarity questions like:

“what does the desired situation look like?”

“How does it look like when the problem is resolved?”

“what does success look like to you?”

“I’m just curious, if you are more respected, what would you family, friends, colleagues say about
you?

“What you are trying to tell me is that at the end of the day, you really want to be a good mother / a
respected worker”

“Let’s focus on what you want. Let’s think of ways and small steps of how you can be a better
mother to your children”
2. The what’s better question.
Refocuses back on what the progress has been so far.
It often has a motivating effect. Useful guidelines are
to keep the question simple

“so, what’s better since the last time we met”

Followed by affirmation
3. The coping question.
These types of questions open clients up to their resiliency.
Clients are survivors in their life experience. Helping them see what works,
allows them to grow from a place of strength.

Questions like
“What is working for you?”
“what keeps you going under these difficult circumstances?” ,
“Was there a time you are nervous but yet you choose to continue?”
“What worked well for you when you face a similar challenge?”
“what helps you keep going even though things are hard?”,
“What kept you going so far even if the fear is so real?”
“how did you manage to cope before you gave up?”
3. The coping question.
Usually helpful when the client is really having a hard time and
can barely find the energy to solve problems.

Questions like
• “Considering how depressed you feel, how did you still
manage to get out of bed this morning and make it to our
appointment (or make it to work)?”

• “You are uncertain to continue working on your goals.

I’m curious what has helped you to work on them up to now?”
4. The past success & exception seeking question.
Gathers resources from a situation where the client has known how to deal with the
situation. Since the problem intensity is likely to have fluctuated in this past, these
questions explore what was different and how the receiver has made that happen before

Questions like
“so when have things been better?”
“have you ever been able to solve such a problem before?”

“has there been a time in which this problem was not so intense ? What was different?”

“ What were you doing that might made that happen?”

“Could you remember a time you did well in something?”
“Im just curious that time when u succeed, what did you do to make that happen?”
Solution Focus
4. Paraphrasing Mentoring
using the examples
receivers words.
Shows concern and that you’re listening. Make sure to use the exact
words (visual, auditory or kinaesthetic) the other person has used as this
language matching is what often does the trick.

Support the individual in coming up with their own

solutions and goals, by reflecting on what they say
and feel.
Solution Focus Mentoring examples
5. The scaling question.

These are questions that allow a client to rate their experience. This allow
client to identify where they are now, where they hope to be and to evaluate
their motivation to change.

Asks the receiver to grade where he stands on the subject on a scale of 1-10,
where ten is the desired outcome.

Asking follow up questions like”

“How does the next level looks like to you?”

“What does it takes to reach the next level?”

“
“what would an 8 feel like?”, “what would you have to do to get to a 8″
Solution Focus Mentoring examples
6. The miracle question.

• I’m just curious if u could reset your life, how would you want to design your life

• Imagine if all the problems and worries are gone, how would you describe your life?

• What would happen next?”

• "Suppose a miracle happen and you can manage your anger very well, what
improvement and changes would you see?"
Solution Focus Mentoring examples
7. The exception seeking question.

Since the problem intensity is likely to have fluctuated in this past, these
questions explore what was different and how the receiver has made that
happen before. (example a person don’t get angry or disappointed with
colleagues all the time)

• “Questions like “has there been a time in which this problem was not so
intense ? …….(pause and listen)

(then continue…..) What was different? What were you doing that might
made that happen?”
Two simple ideas lie behind solution focus:

1) Although our lives may be full of problems, there are times which are
less problematic, or times when we have coped well with something, or
overcome an issue, or survived the problem. These are our ‘exceptions’.

• Whatever we are doing differently at these 'exceptional' times will be the

basis of a potential solution.

• Draw out the motivation to repeat these ‘exceptions’

Focus on the exceptions

• “So, how did you get to school on time for the last two days? What did
you do to make it happen?”

• “I notice you were on time for the past 2 days. How did you manage to
do that?” (empower them)

Vs

• Rather than “ You’ve been late for most of the week”

8. The usefulness question.
These are questions that motivates the intention to make the
session as useful as possible to those involved.

Questions like
“how can we make this conversation as useful as possible?”
“what do you want to come out of this conversation?”
“Is there anything you would notice if this session was worth
your time?”.
9. Solution focused directing. Ways of using solution
focused techniques to influence someone to achieve a
goal.

Usually in the form of “how can you … So that …”

“What can you do now…….So that…..”

“What can you consider moving forward?”

“I’m impressed/heartened that you are considering”

Solution Focus Mentoring (coping)
10. Solution focused offering.
• “Can I suggest?”

• “In your opinion, is what I’m offering moving you forward?”

Solution-focused listening

Listen out for

• Strengths
• Goals
• Values
• Resources
• Achievements
• Desires
• Competence
Goals Strengths

Values
Exercise
How can you help a person with stage fright/public speaking?
 Solution Focus Mentoring (public speaking)
"Dont be scared" doesnt help (they are already scared)

Instead

• When was the time you appear more confident with people, maybe speaking to 2-3 persons?
(looking at a resourceful past)

• “when was a time u got your message out?”

• if u realise a good thing u did, extrapolate it to other areas of life. The more evidence we
brought out (the past), it can help a person to move forward
Solution Focus Mentoring
To handle youth’s “I don’t know” (public speaking)
Get them to think, create options and unlock possibilities

“What else?”

“What are some possible choices?

“Suppose you know; what would you say?

Solution Focus Mentoring (coping)

Keep sentences short

Practice it